Originally Posted by StayingStrong32
I've been married for only 5 years, and my wife now has had 2 affairs. That is not a good track record. I believe 1 strike is forgivable. 2 strikes is usually reason to leave. And 3 strikes, especially if it happens sometime in the next 5 years, is even to much for me to handle. As much as I love my wife, I recognize there is a terrible pattern here, and I'm still hopeful that this is a pattern which can be broken. If it happens a 3rd time, I will be sure that it can't be broken, and I'll need to move on. I still want to grow old have more kids with her, but I really need to let her know that I will not allow this anymore.

Well one, two or three strikes isn't actually the point. If you don't deal with this properly - as you didn't last time - there may be 4, 5 or 6 or.......

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I know that many of you will say to leave her NOW, but I won't accept that.

And with good reason - she's a SERIAL cheater who cheated in the first DAYS of your marriage. She is a bad risk and is doing nothing other than the bare minimum to keep you appeased and not kicking her to the kerb. However this does not mean there is no hope.

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She's my best friend,

Yet you are not her best friend

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we're on our way to a great recovery

Not yet you're not! This is DENIAL.

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she's reading all the MB material and building back my "love bank" which she stole from me (as I say). So this is not an option.

Bare minimum is what she is doing and not even that.

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I guess my question is, is it possible for someone with such a bad track record to change and be faithful forever? What is the best way of accomplishing that? She wants to change, and she will do whatever it takes.

Well I posted some specifics to you and you blew me off. I already posted what it will take.


Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.