Originally Posted By: MelodyLane
Chris, I believe it was pretty clear. I will repost so you can read again!


I already gave you feedback saying that you wrote wasn't clear to me, so re-phrasing it to clarify may work better towards communicating your idea / ideas to me rather than re-posting it and expecting me to re-read the same UNclear message. To break it down Kindergarten style for you, what has transpired between us was this:
Hey, I didn't understand what you wrote. Can you explain what you meant?
Well, I'll re-post it so you can read it again!

IMO, that statement appears to me to be argumentative (and possibly condescending) rather than one designed to communicate.

And, Mel - you are incorrect with what you said here.

One does not need to get "individual counseling" to take MEDS; she can put that money to better use and get marriage coaching..

No one can (legitimately) receive a script for meds without seeing an MD and no one can (legitimately) receive a script for psychotropic meds without Psych sessions (for at least initial evaluation / baseline & monitoring...). That just how our healthcare system works.

Also, I think that mental health is a key ingredient for happy & healthy interpersonal relationships. Some people need assistance with mental health and it seems that disgustedandsad's H is one of those people according to what she has shared with us. Personally, I hope that her H continues to seek care even as they work on their Marriage. Perhaps the person treating him right now isn't right for him; however, he is on meds for depression and needs to be under a doctor's care. To suggest they redirect funds to Marriagebuilders INSTEAD of taking care of her H's mental health seems ghoulish to me.

To be clear - both working on the marriage & working on his mental health is the ideal; however, if it's an either-or type situation I would choose his mental health first. You have given good and great advice on many occasions Mel, but I hope they don't listen to you on this one.

Please keep in mind that I am a big supporter of Marriagebuilders, I believe it works & I have experienced real changes in my marriage because of it. Also my H & I purchased the Marriagebuilders program for ourselves. I just feel it's irresponsible (and scary) to suggest someone stop seeing an MD.

Whats up with pasting the Harley's mission statement in your signature? Was someone confused about this? grin

Mel, it's an excerpt from the text in the Welcome area above.

Why did I use it in my signature? I think a few people are confused about what this environment is meant to be and what it is. There are people here who need to be reminded that this is a PEER environment - some of these people are on the giving end of the "advice" and some are on the receiving end of the "advice."