In my opinion, there is no logic to support either the proposition that this kind of behavior will occur in future relationships, nor the proposition that success is guaranteed in future relationships.

Ultimately, I think it comes down to what you believe about YOURSELF, not what you believe about other people. And about this point I'm very clear. While occasionally things happen that are out of my realm of ability to influence, the vast majority of things that happen in my life are my own doing (good and bad). I do believe that the breakdown of my marriage was in part my doing, but I also categorize my husband's run from the situation as one of those unusual "out of my influence" things. If I had better skills in the marriage though, it would never have happened. But I do believe very strongly that I will do much better in my next marriage and that will likely make that marriage better (even if it's with the same man). I also believe that my strong guidance will make the difference for my children, so they will understand the concepts of love, commitment, honor, and values despite my husband's behavior.

Nellie, I know this brings you down and you have a right to feel that way towards your husband, who has really let all of you down. But I don't think it helps you to extend it to the rest of humanity. Look at all the great people on this board who really do care about their marriages and families. There are plenty of people like this in the world.