Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 258 of 333 1 2 256 257 258 259 260 332 333
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
In my opinion. Of course if I were to really give my opinion it would be that there is not such thing as uncertain love.

I agree - true love is not uncertain.

With J, it's not that love is uncertain, it's ........ what's going to come of it?

I enjoyed reading about your travels Weaver. It's fun to know what others are doing.

You are doing so well. Your thoughts are organized, your outlook so wise. I smile when I read you these days, I used to hurt when I read.

This weekend we'll have a B day party for two grand children. A boy one year old, and a girl two years old. (Different families) The mothers of both will be in a triathlon Sat morning, and the party will be at a local park in the afternoon.

Saturday evening, my W and I will begin a short three day trip. We try to take one both spring, and fall. This would be the fall one, in case anyone wondered.

We plan on staying in Boulder city Nevada and spending a little time in the desert, and at the lake.

It's fun to travel with my partner. It's fun to spend all day, every day with her for a while.

Weaver,
Thanks again for sharing.

You too J.

Graycloud,
Not sure where you plan on doing your race. We a series here it seems. http://www.sgtrifecta.com/
Or here - look for St George
http://www.trifind.net/nf/ut.html

Both our DIL's were in the May one, and now also in the Sept one.

If you were to ever come here to race, We would be glad to be a support crew. Subject to advance notice and so on.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
just wanted to say *hi*


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Hi Faithful !

What should I say........
I am wanting to ask questions, but don't know if I ought to.

How about this -

Merry Christmas !
And a very happy new year too !!!!

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
(pssst...SS...ask her)

Hi!

Monday is the day.

I have the creeping crud tho. That was the doctor's official diagnosis.

- Kimmy


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

Recovered!
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
hmmm...creeping crud, couldn't find it in the medical dictionary. Must be one of those Texan diseases <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Ask away, SS <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Keeping you in my prayers, Kimmy and Wookie. God's blessings on both of you.

Waving madly to Weaver! Hi to JJ, Appy, 2long, FAR, and anyone else I may have missed.


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Oh geez, I forgot the man whose name is on the thread! Hi GC <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
OK Faithful,
How about telling all - with details

Better or worse?
Dates or no dates?
Help or no help?

And the big one -
Does your chewing gum loose it's flavor on the bed post overnight?

Oh, and vacation?

Kimmy,
I know you can take it....... but just how it is waiting?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Quote
Better or worse? Better, definitely better. Every week I see him taking more responsibility for his actions and becoming more repentent. Still need a lot of work in the conflict avoidance and passive agressive areas, though now I am owning my part of the dance too. We are going to need some counseling at some point I think.
Dates or no dates? Very few dates recently as DS is in therapy the past few weeks and that takes our helper away. This should end next week.
Help or no help? See above

And the big one -
Does your chewing gum loose it's flavor on the bed post overnight? Heck, it loses its flavor BEFORE I put it on the bedpost. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Oh, and vacation? We have to go back to the drawing board for dates as his office secretary is gone most of October. We are thinking early November now. No reservations yet.
All in all? Getting better all the time. First time in 5 years that I can breathe. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Nice he is helping. Remember that all marriages (all that I have ever known anything about) have problems at times. Mine does. It's lots better, and we like it, but we still have days.......

Most men wish they could marry the perfect women - because then she would be patient with our faults, and love us even when we make big mistakes. Of course, all women wish........ Ah - but then, you would already know that one, wouldn't you.

If you are coming this way, early November is USUALLY still wonderful. Last year it didn't freeze here until Thanksgiving weekend. Cool mornings, nice afternoons. USUALLY.

My gum has just about lost it's flavor for today too. I think I'll go home to dinner.

I won't holler at you for not doing dates weekly. It's hard, but I won't.
Really, I won't.
Promise.

It's hard though.

Did I say that already?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
BTW,
More on how DS, and DD are doing?
Both ways - every day life, and also with coping with the fallout from all that has happened.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
G
Member
OP Offline
Member
G
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 4,178
Hi FF - and thanks SS. I'd like to do a race next year. My MTB race last month taught me that endurance swimming doesn't give you legs tough enough to be King of the Mountain. Playing tennis with my buddy from CA yesterday reminded me again. Getting older and creakier too.

Update on me: just finished a house project. Working hard. Don't ask about women. It's tough out there. I should be doing much better. Tomorrow's another day.

As for being here vs. not being here, like J was talking about... I hurt when I read people's stuff here. I read their stories and it feels like it's happening to me.

GC

Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,421
Q
Member
Offline
Member
Q
Joined: Dec 2002
Posts: 1,421
Me too, gc.

I've been thinking about this a lot since the Lady Clueless stuff happened. Not the first time for one of those arguments either.

But then I started wondering what the heck I'm doing here. I think maybe I'm really, finally an infidelity survivor. I don't know whether we're going to stay married long term or not, but I don't fret over it anymore either... ...until I get sucked back into the drama of fresh wounds and struggles to understand a particular affair.

iloveulove is pretty darn quiet these days, but I think I need to hie myself on over there more of the time, and spend less time here, on loveshack.org, and on SYMC.

Make my "stand" there.

-Qfwfq (aka 2long)
P.S. Hey, we've got WALLS in our living room! and it took less than FIVE YEARS to get them!

P.P.S. Peace, tranquility to all.

Last edited by Qfwfq; 09/22/06 12:49 AM.
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 8,297
Hey GC, long time no see. I feel somewhat the same but for different reasons.

I mean I wonder why I still hang out here, not around the campfire although I do sit on the outskirts sometimes, but on MB.

I guess I hang around because sometimes I hope something I say will move someone in the right direction, BS or WS.

You know we have a lot of collective wisdom between us and I really think we sometimes make a difference. I can only hope we do anyway.

Peace to you too 2long.

Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
SS, have a really good time with your wife this weekend! How fortunate that you are still having fun together and that you have shared a life together.

Sometimes I think people don't realize how blessed that is, at least not the people who still have their families intact and seem so unhappy and unsatisfied.

I know why 2long, Appy, Faith, Kimmy, and all the others who were given the opportunity to stay or to go, stayed. You all could have gotten out and started over with someone new but you didn't. And you didn't because you see beyond yourself to the greater good. That is what greatness is made of. And to be able to do that and be happy, satisfied, productive people at peace with themselves and their experience is beyond awesome.

SS, you have something together with your wife and children that is truly wonderful, and I hope that the others who are still together get to that place as well, and I think they will...for the rest I hope for them the same as I hope for myself, a life of peace, love and service to others. What more after all is there worth hoping for?

Being with those really old people in Baltimore calmed me, soothed my soul so to speak in ways I can't articulate. It was wonderful because it wasn't all about hanging out at the beach and nightclubs, we actually got to share a few days out of the lives of a couple of really great men. Not Generals or Presidents but men who were really, really great in what they stood for, their legacy is awesome in that they have a lifetime of giving and service to others, including their families.

Awesome hearts and awesome minds...that is why I come back to the fire and MB as well.

I love reading what everyone here thinks. In our 3D lives how many people ever really get a chance to know what is on other people's minds? I mean the important stuff about how they feel, what their dreams are, what their pain, their experience of life is?

2Long that thread you referred to was very hurtful to even read. Those threads always end up hurtful to someone. The last one I ended up backing down, and it bothered me for days that because of not wanting to hurt someone elses feelings I let them talk to me like I was stupid... You were right, they are not enlightening, not in the least... very hurtful to a lot people.

I emailed SecondHarvest yesterday to ask how I could help, and I know that you Gray are always always looking for ways to contribute...have you heard of that outfit?

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
Hey Weaver.....



(((((((((((((((((((((((((WEAVER))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I was gonna do that yesterday, but got side tracked.

- Kimmy


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

Recovered!
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Member
Offline
Member
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
{{GC}} The right woman is gonna find you. You are a class act my friend. 2long, I hope you will come back now and then. I don't post as much as i used to, don't feel the need which is good. I too feel I am a survivor. However, I got so much from MB I still feel compelled to give back.

Weaver that was beautiful about the older people you spent time with. What is second harvest?

SS, have a great time this weekend.


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Oh Kimmy!

Right back at ya, girl.

Geesh, how can anyone not do well with all this hugging going on. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Did you ever read what happens to little babies when they have no physical, loving contact?

GB and I were just talking about the importance of human touch (we are both very physically and verbally affectionate) and the healing properties of human touch.

My little girl often acts like she doesn't like me to hug and squeese her anymore, but I still glimpse the gleam in her eye after I do it anyway. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Us Mom's know things like that, don't we Kimmy?

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 8,344
>Us Mom's know things like that, don't we Kimmy?

Yup.

I'm lucky tho. Bekah still thinks I hung the moon.

Maybe she'll be an easy 16 like her older brother?!?!


I never had to take the Kobayashi Maru test until now. What do you think of my solution?

O'hana means family, and family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten.

My Story

Recovered!
Dealan-de #1205441 09/22/06 02:13 PM
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 240
Hiking by your woods this week, reading the posts from earlier and wanted to pop in and say that you campfire folks help others more than you know.

Before my marriage ended, JustJ helped me a ton over at SYMC. Ex and I worked w/Cerri but X couldn't let go of dream of being w/OW. They are now together, w/an OC that they conceived while x and I were still married. "Are they married?", everyone asks me. Well, I have no idea.

I love reading about your music interests (I'm an Americana loving chick myself). I pay $$ to see those guys.

And Grey, I did my first mtn bike race last January. Is it something about being single that makes us try this stuff? Next time maybe we should ditch the team and go the whole 24 hrs! Talk about earning your beer huh? Anyway, it proves our hearts can't be that broken.

2Long, I can certainly relate to your troubles. XH didn't pull the plug on our M...he was too passive for that. He just sleepwalked through several years of our lives, screwing OW off and on and lying about it until I decided I was worth more than what I was getting. I admire you for hanging in there.

So here I am, I've been a SAHM for years and have to go back to work yesterday, but haven't found anything yet. I've become a kick-A cyclist (both road and mtn) and I play tennis a couple of days a week. I've posted on MB over the years but mostly lurked. Because of folks like you, I've been able to accept my situation. I wish things had turned out better for the sake of my children. I have lots of terrific male friends...some of whom were interested until they found out that I'm a walking bundle of issues.

Because of you, when those guys asked me out I was able to laugh and say "not yet, my life is a mess". And it was easy. And I think they appreciated it.

So thanks again. I'll let you resume your regularly scheduled programming.

Last edited by starving; 09/22/06 02:15 PM.
starving #1205442 09/22/06 05:04 PM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 2,621
A
Member
Offline
Member
A
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 2,621
Speaking of, well, something...

It is appropriate we end this week by noting at 12:03 a.m. (and some seconds) tomorrow morning, September 23 (EDT), the world will experience the Autumnal Equinox.

This is the moment the sun is located directly over the equator.

When the sun is balanced on this knife-edge, it can fall one way or the other. Only later will we scientists know for sure which way it has fallen.

We will determine this by examining the coats on caterpillars.

Stoke up the campfire, put on some dark robes and enjoy this mysterious annual event.


"Never forget that your pain means nothing to a WS." ~Mulan

"An ethical man knows it is wrong to cheat on his wife. A moral man will not actually do it." ~ Ducky

WS: They are who they are.

When an eel lunges out
And it bites off your snout
Thats a moray ~DS
Page 258 of 333 1 2 256 257 258 259 260 332 333

Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,254 guests, and 50 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5