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Or is this rhetorical?

k

Last edited by Justuss; 08/03/05 11:38 PM.
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Rhetorical :-)

Last edited by Justuss; 08/03/05 11:38 PM.
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PS: But it'd have no effect if other steps are not taken (i.e. 'make your M affair free' ;-)

Last edited by Justuss; 08/03/05 11:39 PM.
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Why don't I ?

Two reasons:

1. His GF and YS see some merit in his continued breathing. GF asked me not to hurt him becase they needed SOMETHING left they could respect.
2. OM GF and OM rebuilding a working relationship is a good way of reducing the risk of an affair rekindling. My beting seven colours of sheet out of him would bring focus back to bear upon what has transpired.

So I stay my hand. Or should that be baby sledge and mace.
Any of that changes and i will visit him in a heartbeat.


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Why don't I?

For one reason only... jail time would mean I'm away from Undo.


Hopeful4future


The character of a person is defined by their actions...not their intentions. Otherwise, the world would be full of Saints.

BS: 40 (Me)
xFWW: 50
Married: 9/97
PA: 3 months
D-Day: 6/30/2005 (she revealed to me)
Divorced: 10/2/2008
Happy that I've moved on
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to be fair...you'd have to kick WS's ass as well.

Hmmmm....

The real reason? Jail...plain and simple...our kids live with me and if I went to jail well guess where my kids would be?

With WS and married OM that I just beat the crap out of...not good


"Who are you" said the Caterpillar
This was not an encouraging opening for a conversation.

Alice replied, rather shyly, "I--I hardly know, sir, just at present...At least I know who I WAS when I got up this morning, but I think I must have been changed several times since then."
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1. Jail

2. He would probably sue me, cause my W told him I make more money than him. She told me she didn't say how much exactly I make cause "it wasn't his business". That seemed funny to me because I would have rather she shared that intimate information on my income with him instead of the intimate thing she did share with him. I would rather he know my income instead of "knowing" my W.


Me (XBH): 39
Kids: 13yoS, 11yoS, 6yoD

"Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road.
Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go.
So make the best of this test, and don't ask why.
It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time."
-GOOD RIDDANCE!
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I would like to offer another possible approach to this problem.

I have pondered on how adultery could be grouped into one of the numerous "hate crime" categories. Since the crime is committed against an easily definable group(betrayed spouses) and is accompanied by oral abuse, " I hate you, I never loved you" and the A partner echoes the same mantra " your husband/wife is an *sshole", I would think that there would be an alternate solution to beating the cr*p out of the OP.

Perhaps we should run this by an officer of the court and get his/her slant on the matter. Wouldn't it be nice to have a legal manner in which to both relieve our anger and extract a token of legal recourse without exposing the BS to possible criminal and financial peril?


Divorced:
"Never shelter anyone from the realities of their decisions": Noodle

You believe easily what you hope for ernestly

Infidelity does not kill marriages, the lying does
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All the more reason I keep saying,to bring back severe punishment for Adultery,forget Scarlet letters. I am talking $$$$$ and jail time.Bigger deterrents.Automatic release of all funds and property to the BS? Yes.You have to hit them in the pocket book and take away time from the OP.

We shall not sink to their level of abuse and abhorrent behavior through violence krusht.As much as we can fantasize about it( I have for sure) it's beneath you.

O


BW(me)40 DDay 10/11/03 Divorcing 'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1 ~Let Higher Minds Prevail~ --------------- ~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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It's not that we can't ... it's just that we would need to be prepared to face the concequences of our actions.

Jail time is my only reason ...

But why should there be no repercussions for the OM? There has got to be something that I/we can do to aleiviate some of this anger and frustration.

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10Girl,

It appears we are both still on the same unwavering course. Been reading your posts when I get on MB( not that often anymore). You are in my thoughts and prayers.


Divorced:
"Never shelter anyone from the realities of their decisions": Noodle

You believe easily what you hope for ernestly

Infidelity does not kill marriages, the lying does
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I think adultery should be illegal.

Jail terms and/or fines for the perpetrators.

By the way, the Bible seems to support revenge against the OM.

Proverbs 6:34
for jealousy arouses a husband's fury,
and he will show no mercy when he takes revenge.

The OM in my case is lucky to be above ground.

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I had no idea what a no-fault divorce was before d-day. It is really an insane idea. I did not want to end the M. She did, but instead of telling me that, she decided to fall in love with Mr. Trailer Park.

...But it's nobody's fault.

While kicking his a$$ in his own trailer would have been lots of fun, it was almost as fun seeing the look on his face when I showed up over there and he thought I was going to, and at a much lower cost to me.


ME-28yo WW-29yo DD-5yo DS-4yo M-5yrs DDay-5\26\05 Click here to read my story. "Worry never robs tomorrow of its sorrow, it only saps today of its joy." - Leo Buscaglia
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Worldofhurt,

Naturally you can physically go out and kill almost anyone if you choose.I am talking restraint and living a life of integrity and closer to God.

We *can't do these things because then we do sink to their level.

Take it from someone who had a long standing hatred of the homewrecker and wanted nothing but ill will to befall her.You must divert your energies in a different direction.Fantasize all you want but the OP is just a waste of time.They are opportunists.

If I had my way,OP would be just as guilty in court as the WS and suffer as well.Sometimes I wish I lived in NC.OP do not benefit from being with adulterers.Their lives are already misguided and doomed.IMO.

O


BW(me)40 DDay 10/11/03 Divorcing 'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1 ~Let Higher Minds Prevail~ --------------- ~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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CY,

I put out a post to you some time ago but you must have missed it.I hope you will give us an update soon.I am sure to not be the only one who would like to hear how you are doing and how your Mom is doing.I am still on the D course.Only it is more adversarial now,unfortunately.

You will be in my prayers and thoughts as well~Take care

O


BW(me)40 DDay 10/11/03 Divorcing 'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1 ~Let Higher Minds Prevail~ --------------- ~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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"We *can't do these things because then we do sink to their level."

Well, I'm gonna have to say that a man with anger or rage doesn't care or think about sinking to any levels... though you do make rational sense.

But there's just something satisfying about hearing the snap of a bone.


Hopeful4future


The character of a person is defined by their actions...not their intentions. Otherwise, the world would be full of Saints.

BS: 40 (Me)
xFWW: 50
Married: 9/97
PA: 3 months
D-Day: 6/30/2005 (she revealed to me)
Divorced: 10/2/2008
Happy that I've moved on
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Sorry to threadjack

10Girl,

I am between surgeries and only have a couple of minutes.

Mom is not doing well and I have been flying back home to try to talk her into a G tube but she has been pretty adamant against it. She can no longer speak and she has been in and out of the hospital/ER with aspiration pneumonia.

My brother is now working again but faces some more surgery for assorted ortho and uro problems after his accident.

Me, I am going to mediation next week as a result of her attorney threatening to demand an expensive accountant go over my practice books ( he obviously feels that I had been hiding money from my WW before I was blindsided 1 and 1/2 years ago!) Wish I had been that clairvoyant!!!!!!!!!!!


Divorced:
"Never shelter anyone from the realities of their decisions": Noodle

You believe easily what you hope for ernestly

Infidelity does not kill marriages, the lying does
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The sound of a crack of a bone can do so much more than hours of therapy. It's a way of releasing all that negative energy so you don't take it out on your WS.

And afterwards you can contemplate it all from your jail cell.


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Now hopeful,

Isn't what you just said similar to the kind of trouble a WS gets into? It is of utmost importance to always keep a level head(care & think) or try to in difficult circumstances.

Snapping bones,in my opinion,have nothing on the efficiency and quietude a gun with silencer can bring. Do not pass go.Go directly to JAIL!

Ok,nuff of that.Before I get edited.

O


BW(me)40 DDay 10/11/03 Divorcing 'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1 ~Let Higher Minds Prevail~ --------------- ~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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UGH.SO sorry about your Mom and Brother Cy.And with your WW and her threats,you have a lot on your plate.I hope you are taking good care of yourself.Take some time off work to regroup if you can.NURSES ORDERS!

I may be doing the same accountant thing soon as I feel my WH has been less than 100% honest about all our money.

Stay strong.We have to get through this.

O


BW(me)40 DDay 10/11/03 Divorcing 'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1 ~Let Higher Minds Prevail~ --------------- ~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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