Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
Here I sit in coastal CT looking at the snow piling up. I don't have to shovel my driveway which is SO WONDERFUL! I've been reading, watching movies, playing around on the computer. It's getting boring...My boys are with their father this weekend.

It would be sooo nice to be snowed in with that special someone...maybe next winter. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,430
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,430
Hi Nams,

We only have about 3" [NC-WV] and are by no means snowed in.

BUT, I know what you're thinking about being snowed in with someone special.
The snow is so pretty outside and the big flakes that come down are so romantic, and there is no one to romance it with!

We will get to experience it one day though. And won't it be special then?!

Karona


Divorced 12/17/2003 Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 5,924
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 5,924
northern mass, . . i just cleared the driveway for the second time . . .

and am thinking about venturing across town. . .

lived here all my life, this is nothing unusual

wiftty


Learning from your own mistakes creates experience, learning from books creates knowledge, combining the two together creates wisdom => You start with a full bag of luck, and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
I've lived in CT much of my life & I'm used to this as well. But, I still hate to shovel. I've cleared my porch & steps 3 times but I'm hoping once more & I'm done.

I lived in Ayer, MA Wifty many years ago when it was still Ft. Devens. They now have a high security prison there. It was pretty strange to visit & see all the places we'd carried on a regular life just sitting or falling a part.

Living here on the coast we either get hammered or don't get too much. Today it's too much. I liked Jan. weather better.

Thanks for stopping by Karona. Yes it will be special when we get our chance. I hope I remember to look back & be extra grateful remembering the storm where I was alone wishing to share it with someone special. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 268
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Aug 2004
Posts: 268
Just finished snow-blowing the drive way! Whew! Got about 15 or so inches here in S. NH.

I was born at Ft. Devens, by the way!


personal recovery
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,430
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Mar 2004
Posts: 1,430

I think we will Nams. We will remember "all" the thoughts of when we were alone. We may have never looked at these times the way we do now, or, maybe took them for granted. How amazing those days will be when we live them, with someone special.

Karona


Divorced 12/17/2003 Formerly KEB1205 Reg 9/02
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
Born at Ft. Devens! When did you live there? Do you remember anything about it?

I don't know if they tore down the hospital you were born in or not. The prison is on the highest point which is where the hospital was.

I lived there for about 4 years. It was so weird to see this once thriving community not in existence any more. What an impact it must have on a community when a military facility closes.

I live near Groton, CT where we have a major sub base. It was under discussion for closure but it was found there were serious errors in the way the numbers were calculated showing the cost of closue vs staying open. Fortunately it has stayed open & will until the next round of base closures comes around. Then, who knows.


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 613
F
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 613
Quote
Any one else snowed in & bored?

Hey nams:

Not snowed in but terribly bored. Had to spend most of the weekend outside and these miserable mid-60's temp's are about to get to me. Plus - that darn sun is so bright that I have to wear sunglasses and I'm getting sick & tired of buying sunscreen! Then - I have to spend 3 hours washing & drying shorts & T-shirts for DD and I to wear. It's a real mess down here - but I guess somebody has to put up with it! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

FR


You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you stop to look fear in the face. Challenges can be stepping stones or stumbling blocks. It’s just a matter of how you look at them. The purpose of life is to live it, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,707
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Feb 2001
Posts: 1,707
nams, I grew up in CT but now live in CA. We haven't even had any snow yet, in fact it's been unseasonably warm with temps in the low 70's - daffodils and flowering quince in bloom. I haven't put on shorts yet, like FR, but I did wear sandals today!

One thing I've learned from this situation is to always try to remember to feel grateful for what I've got so I'll never again have to sing the refrain, "you don't know what you got till it's gone!"


FBS, D'day 12/00 * NC since 5/02 * divorce final 5/06 * property settlement 9/06 What you can do or think you can do, begin it. For boldness has Magic, Power, and Genius in it. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 308
D
Member
Offline
Member
D
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 308
Nams, add in a snowball fight with that man, whoever he may be. There are other things that make the snow more enjoyable... ; ) (I ALWAYS look on the brightside!)

Besides, if we had that sunny weather all year round we would probably rub it in like FR, rather than cherishing the warm sun on our face -we appreciate it! j/k fr!
I could use some of that sun and a palm tree within 100 ft right now!
We didn't get the snow here in the heartland this time, but we've got the temps. YUK! Can't wait for summer!!!
And, can you imagine being BORED in that kind of weather?!


"As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same"- Nelson Mandella
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
First let me say I hesitated to use the word bored. I DO appreciate what I have, I was just trying to stir up some activity on a day that didn't have much going on. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

FR, you're naughty! I LOVE (AND I'm grateful for <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />) a change in seasons. But some of the extremes of those seasons I could live without. So just think about that as you go about your every day life in shorts & a tee shirt! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> If I remember correctly summers in sunny Fla. are brutally humid & they last longer than any human should be forced to endure such oppressive weather! Hey, enjoy it while you can! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Hee, hee.

Drita, yeah, the cold keeps you inside & that can get boring. But I'm sure you're appreciative of all the loveliness your part of the country has to offer. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 5,924
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: Apr 2000
Posts: 5,924
nams,

i drive through Ft Devens every day to work. . . i live in the next town over. . . have lived here for 40 + years. . . Ayer is not standing still any more, the devens redevelopment has three towns deciding how to divide it up amongst the three or create a new town. . .

i remember that you lived in Ft Devens, . . so did one of my college acquaintenances, and several friends / acquaintenances also worked on subs out of Groton. A classmate of mine captains one of the harbor tugs there.. .

its a nice place, but i dislike LI Sound. . .

wiftty


Learning from your own mistakes creates experience, learning from books creates knowledge, combining the two together creates wisdom => You start with a full bag of luck, and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck.
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
I got stuck in Florida due to snow. Didn't return until today, and it was the coldest weather in florida. Following a work conference, I just wanted to get back to my kids, not get back 2 days late.

I was stuck with my best friend at work, and spent the majority of the time spewing MB stuff at him, and trying to get him to get phone counseling. They've been to an MB seminar, but neither one will change. Remember when we all lived in that horrible place where the M is bad, and neither party thinks its their job to change it. It's even depressing listening to it.
We stayed in South beach which was great, but he's not quite the person I'd hoped to visit with (I still haven't met him) <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
Wiftty, The surrounding towns are lovely. Harvard (if I have that right), to name one. I taught preschool & kindergarten in a town over from Ft. Devens. It was privately owned by a woman who had run it for years. Maybe you attended it as a child.

Is it Harvard that has the prep school? Very pretty up there.

How unusual that Ayer is being divided. Was it once a mill town, then military base, then without either nothing?

I remember one restaurant that had a great breakfast. One reason I remember it is because for bread with your meal they served sliced white bread.

What's not to like about L.I. Sound? The congestion? The inability to fish or dig for shell fish due to pollution many times a year? Or maybe it's the ban on swimming when we get heavy rains & sewer plants experience run off. Or the lack of access in CT to beaches because so much of the shore line is privatey owned. Take your pick.

My town is one of the last fishing villages left in CT. Most of the town seems to be made up of people who vacationed here at one time, loved it, moved here then complain about the fishing industry. That or they're weekend people from NYC.
No offence to New Yorkers intended.

One such couple bought a house on a great piece of property. Nice water views, pretty houses. The house was modest by McMansion standards, perhaps 2500/3000 sf. They wanted to "remodel" bringing the sf up 10,000 sf. The proposed "home" would have stood out like the sore thumb it was & the building permits were denied. I think they sold & moved on.

Hey, is your tug boat captain friend single? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
Hey Newly, thanks for stopping by. Stuck in Fla. due to snow sounds good. But in your case NOT. Think of your time there as a public service or as an intervention for a struggling couple.


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 4,199
Thanks nams. Have you ever just wanted to slap your friends and say, "take some action to improve your marriage or stop complaining about it?"
The wife won't even read the MB materials. She knows I believe in them, but she just can't or won't do anything to improve the sitch (I believe depression), but it is difficult to watch.
I keep reminding these friends that they have a good foundation for a marriage, and it can be improved. Hmm. Love is an action - right?
Enjoy your CT coast. I've never even been to Mystic Seaport.


It was a marriage that never really started.
H: Conflict Avoider, NPD No communication skills (Confirmed by MC) Me: Enabler
Sep'd 12/01, D'd 08/03.
My joys and the light of my life: DD 11, DD 9
*Approach life and situations from the point of love - not from fear.*
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
N
nams Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 1,775
Yes, I've wanted to slap people who complain about whatever yet do nothing to change their circumstances. Stupid, scared, lazy. to name a few.

Mystic Seaport is nice. I've had a membership for years & may have just let it lapse over the last year or so. I've been there many, many times so when I go now it's just to walk around & people watch.

The Mystic, Stonington, Westerly area is nice, a good place for a couple to visit. The fall & Spring are best, not as many people around. Hey, if you come to the area I'll give you a tour.


Formerly nam here since 07/31/03 coastal, CT

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,027 guests, and 52 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5