This has been a struggle.. We all know that. It hurts, but then again, we all own our own pain after a certain extent, right?

Just recently... and I am talking in terms of the past week to several weeks, my instinct has told me that something is not right.

Instinct for some works..lol

I have found evidence of the MOW here contacting H. To refresh your memory, we are NC. The OC is just over one year old and we carry the health insurance as per MOWH's request. DNA was done.

H whole demeanor has changed. He actually said to me, that MOWH never intended to be a father to this child or he wouldn't have insisted on DNA and the health insurance.

That's a first for that comment.. he used to always say that this was MOWH's child and that he (H) had no right to interfere.

This is a guilt trip coming from MOW, isn't it?

We all live in a small town, we all know the same people. Most everyone knows. I have pushed my H to do the legal deal and get CS done with visitation. He staunchly refuses saying that he would not interfere with her family.

However, when MOW gets bored, she has a right to interfere with mine?

I am looking for a MB way to handle this. I exposed C to MOWH, and again, he was very passsive but said he would get back to me after some investigation.

I told H what I did. He was not happy. He swears she only made one phone call to tell him that the child had an eye infection.

FYI, the child has been in OT for a year...an eye infection warrants contact?

Of course, then I am the ogre here because I have no "feeling" for the caring nature in which way MOW let H know about the child..

If you knew MOW, you'd know this was b..s..

For the record, I have never been opposed to C, though I am grateful for NC as my own COM have suffered enough.

I am tired of my COM paying the price in this small town for two selfish adults, and the positive changes taking place in their father this past year will all be forgotten when they find him sneaking with this woman again.

Help ?

Eibrab

ok why does the mow think your H cares about anything?

If its always been mowH is the father and your H is just the man with the insurance, what is the reason for him finding out about somehing so small and nonemergency?

Tell your husband if its contact time and things have all of a sudden changed then lets call the lawyer and make it legal.

Since she said stuff about the eye then what is all the OT for? Did she mention that since that is something more significant?

Does your H feel entitled to a private convo with the MOW? Probably some things have changed and you are not privy to it yet.

I only know that when I found out about contact after being told there was none... I blew a gasket and told him to leave and if he wanted to have contact be my guess on the streets in the gutter were he belonged... just as soon he promised to tell me every single attempt at contact made wether is was successful or not and he did. Soon I felt at ease there would never be contact again, if there somehow were it would never be without my instant knowledge.

I am sorry I dont know what to tell you but be on your toes and do not let your guard down a periodic check is always a good idea. I still do and I do it openly and he knows it and he is very happy when I do not find anything, so he can say he told me so. I told him you can be happy being correct and I can be happy that you are also. Win Win lol