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#2262039 05/15/09 10:25 PM
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my DH cheated on me last year with a co-worker and we have been married four years we have five kids one on the way and now he is having dreams about wanting to be with a guy he went on adult friend finder for swingers and hind it from me i'm pregnant lost and scared he will leave me. Men help is this normal do men dream like this and he wants sex all the time i'm talking 3&4 times a day

T&J #2262129 05/16/09 05:24 AM
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tj

he had an affair is one thing
he want's to be with a guy is way more
he want's sex 3, 4, times a day pales to wanting to be with a guy

You and your WH need IC and MC. This is way past the arm chair shrinks on this board.

TheRoad #2262136 05/16/09 05:44 AM
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How old are you and DH?

Do both of you work? FT/PT?

How old are the kids?

Was the coworker he cheated with male or female?


WW-40; 2-EA's
H-37

Married 11 years

Now he's been caught

DD-9
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both 26 the oldest 5 4 2 1 and one on the way i stay at home he works over nights and it was a she

T&J #2262303 05/16/09 03:13 PM
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How are you doing?


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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torn i have a hard time trusting him but i love him so much my grandmother told me no man will pass it up if it is there they will take it how do you trust them again

T&J #2262320 05/16/09 04:34 PM
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You trust them when they earn your trust by acting in a trustworthy manner. There is nothing you can do to regain your trust in him. Earning your trust is something he has to do.

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i don't think i can ever trust him do you think it is right to talk about your sex life with a women co-worker you just met when you wont even talk to your wife

T&J #2262423 05/17/09 05:00 AM
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No.


But I, being poor, have only my dreams; I have spread my dreams under your feet; Tread softly because you tread on my dreams -Yeats
imagine #2262456 05/17/09 08:02 AM
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so what do i do he says its no big deal that i just want to fight

T&J #2262605 05/17/09 02:44 PM
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Please use punctuation.

Thanks.

It is a big deal. He is wrong. Tell him that.

Then, tell him that you want him to find another job, because he cannot ever contact this woman again. Also, he should take down his ad for trying to find a male sex partner.

You should install a keylogger on your computer to find out who else he is talking to, because if he is having sex with another woman, and hunting guys, he is probably also already hooked up with other people. This likely is not new for him, because he has told you this is no big deal.

How old are you, how long have you been married, and how did the two of you meet?

SB


Lucky to be where I am, in a safe place to get marriage-related support.
Recovered.
Happy.
Most recent D-day Fall 2005
Our new marriage began that day. Not easily, but it did happen.

Moderated by  Fordude 

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