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#2311492 01/25/10 04:51 PM
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Hey all T2L is currently in a court room going head to head with her WH. He is trying weasle his way out of paying support for his family and lying about his affair.

Please say a prayer for her as she is fighting the good fight against a man so lost he will probally never find his own soul.

Last edited by SIHW; 01/25/10 05:54 PM. Reason: changed title.
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pray

May God's justice and not man's, prevail.


Recovered marriage, recovering self, life gets better everyday laugh
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From your lips to gods own ears.

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pray

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pray pray pray


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
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Im praying for you T2L, I know you were kind of in the same sitch as me I think.....Good luck. pray


BW me-41
WH -39
DS - 9
married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered
DDay aug 2007
found MB dec 2007
Moved out april 2008
still seeing OW
Plan B

Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy. smile
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Good luck T2L. Punch his lights out. Will say a prayer for you.


BW - me
exWH - serial cheater
2 awesome kids
Divorced 12/2011




Many a good man has failed because he had a wishbone where his backbone should have been.

We gain strength, and courage, and confidence by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face... we must do that which we think we cannot.
--------Eleanor Roosevelt
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Well things in court didn't go as T2L hoped. Slimeball got away with paying $1000 less support than they need. Which means T2L will have to move again.

Also of course he lied under oath...no surprise there.

But luckily her DS will not have to go visit his dad at the Barf shack. His dad will have to schedule visitation at T2L's house/city.

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then she needs to get a JOB like has been said in the past. Why is it when a SAHD comes on here telling his story posters say get a job,support yourself and your children,your not working and that makes you look weak in your wifes eyes,and ect. But when a SAHM comes on here posters say make that slime ball pay,he should pay you because that was your carreer, you are intitled to support and ect. Also when a ex goes back to school our advances there pay the other ex expects more support. I dont think that is fair. If the other ex spouce wants more support they can advance themselfs. WHATS FAIR IS FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Last edited by dsd; 01/26/10 06:14 PM.
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Wow, dsd, this must have HIT a nerve?


BS 52, FWH 53, Married 1-1-84
D-day 5-14-07, WH moved in with OW
Plan A 9 months, DARK Plan B 3-17-08 until 3-2-09
WH and OW broke up 1-09
Started over 7-09
Joined: Sep 2008
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Originally Posted by dsd
then she needs to get a JOB like has been said in the past. Why is it when a SAHD comes on here telling his story posters say get a job,support yourself and your children,your not working and that makes you look weak in your wifes eyes,and ect. But when a SAHM comes on here posters say make that slime ball pay,he should pay you because that was your carreer, you are intitled to support and ect. Also when a ex goes back to school our advances there pay the other ex expects more support. I dont think that is fair. If the other ex spouce wants more support they can advance themselfs. WHATS FAIR IS FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reallity is there is not enough money to support two households at the same level as prior to the divorce. In fact, I can argue that at least in my state the child support calculator does a pretty good job of balancing incomes and standards of living. Since exWW is minimally employed, I am paying her pretty much the max CS based on my income. My support order can be divided into thirds - one third is CS directly to her, one third is daycare, the other third is what I retain to support the kids when they are with me since we currently have 50/50. I'm also paying all of the medical insurance as well as all unreimbursed medical expenses. It comes out to about 40% of my gross goes to support the kids. My exWW's beef is she is only seeing a third of the money to support the kids - if I was EOW dad, she would be getting the day care portion, as well as my portion that I retain to support the kids. T2L's situation seems to be similar to my sitch - there's just not enough money to go around once CS is calculated in.

Any alimony that my exWW could potentially be oawarded would SIGNIFICANTLY impact my ability to support the kids - I'm already paying the "maximum" to support the kids based on my income. I would imagine T2L's exWH is in the same boat as me. It's a fact of life and one of the harsh realities of divorce. Both parties get hit hard financially when kids are involved in a divorce.


Me BH 35 WW 36
Married 1998
DS 2002
DD 2005
D Day 1 7/28/08
D Day 2 8/19/08

Divorce Final 3/19/2009
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Yeah, I am also a SAHM, my H and I both made that decision.

My WH recently called me and told me to get a job he needs a new car...my DS is 8 he needs me now more than ever...Its not that I dont want to get one...

HE NEEDS A NEW CAR TO SEE OW WHO LIVES AN HOUR AWAY. A CAR THAT WOULD NOT BE RUN DOWN IF HE WAS NOT DRIVING AN HOUR BACK AND FORTH FOR FOUR YEARS. A CAR THAT HE WOULD NOT NEED IF HE WERE HOME WHERE HE BELONGS ...I WILL BE DAM#ED IF I GET A JOB TO PAY FOR HIS CONDO, AFFAIR EXPENSES AND A NEW CAR. I AM NOT GOING TO SUPPORT HIS AFFAIR! HOW ABOUT OW PAYS FOR THEIR AFFAIR, HOW ABOUT THAT!

Hows that for touching a nerve....


Okay now, T2L...I am sorry you are getting less than expected...esp since you jacka$$ of an ex LIED...Ughhhh, but at least your child does not have to associate with skankho...God Bless.


BW me-41
WH -39
DS - 9
married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered
DDay aug 2007
found MB dec 2007
Moved out april 2008
still seeing OW
Plan B

Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy. smile
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Oh sorry, my point being that T2L deserves every penny she got and even the pennies she didnt get from her WXH.


BW me-41
WH -39
DS - 9
married 12 Yrs together(?) 18 yrs when A discovered
DDay aug 2007
found MB dec 2007
Moved out april 2008
still seeing OW
Plan B

Okay I fixed the ages, it was looking screwy. smile
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When a SAHD comes on here Many if not close to ALL say get a Job so that you can show her that you arent dependent on her(weak),life will go on with or without her,needy and ect.Then when a SAHM comes on her many of the posters say sock it to him,take his pension,401k, get what you can and ect.Examples are PAT45 and LG are a few recent ones.I am just saying it seems one sided on and its that way in many states. I have seen many of times when a couple gets D one of the exes will go back to school to better themselfs and the other ex thinks they are automaticly entitled to bennifit. I think that is wrong. not saying that support should be increased do to inflation and medical. Many times the man might loose his job do to the economy and has to take a lesser paying job and in order to get his support lowered he most hire a attorney and that can be thousands that he or she does nt have. I am say it should be equal after all there are equal rights !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Also did nt T2L husband have to take a lesser job or pay cut of some kind? Again I am not saying what he did was right. I just noticed the difference in posting to a SAHD verses a SAHM on here and in many state laws in regards to fathers rights!

Last edited by dsd; 01/26/10 09:00 PM.
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dsd-

Quote
I just noticed the difference in posting to a SAHD verses a SAHM on here and in many state laws in regards to fathers rights!

This thread wasn't about SAHM and SAHD's rights. It was a request for prayers for T2L who was going into court to face a very wayward and entitled spouse.

IMO-it doesn't matter if the BS was a wage earner or a stay-at-home parent when they go to court to face this kind of destructive evil. It's about support.

If you want to debate the treatment of SAHD's and SAHM's on this site-start a new thread.





johnstwin-

"I may not know what the future holds, but I know who holds my future." -Martin Luther

Remarried my FXH 25 years to the day of our first M. God is so good-and sometimes so unexpected!

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Originally Posted by johnstwin
dsd-

Quote
I just noticed the difference in posting to a SAHD verses a SAHM on here and in many state laws in regards to fathers rights!

This thread wasn't about SAHM and SAHD's rights. It was a request for prayers for T2L who was going into court to face a very wayward and entitled spouse.

IMO-it doesn't matter if the BS was a wage earner or a stay-at-home parent when they go to court to face this kind of destructive evil. It's about support.

If you want to debate the treatment of SAHD's and SAHM's on this site-start a new thread.

well said. Our prayers are with you. clap


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
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DSD for your information....T2L's WH requested her to be a SAHM....he earned a significant income and still does currently.

Unfortunatly his fantasy life and drunken party filled moments and making OW happy top the list before supporting the family he walked out on. T2L does not have any work skills. She has not worked period. Even her DD 18 is having problems finding a job right out of high school.

T2L has enrolled and just started attending college to achieve the education to get a good job to support her son. She is doing what she can in this situation and staying strong for her children whom she also home schooled. That in itself is a tremendous job.


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Look every one gets screwed over when their spouse is having an affair.

For men with WW, they are either kicked out of their houses on false charges, having to support the WW if she is a SAHM, for a period of time, so he ends up supporting her affair too.

For women with a WH, who upon marriage decide to stay home with the kids, with the husband's OK, they get screwed because now they have no work skills and the chances of them making an income like the one their WH is pulling in is not going to happen. Now they most than likely have to downside everything, get spousal support for a limited time, go back to school, and with small kids, get daycare, another expense added to the downfall.

For men who decide to stay home with the kids, hate to say this but the times have not caught up us they are still frown down upon and people do have that "get a job" mindset and how the man is suppose to be the bread winner and support the family.

The BS, either sex is getting screwed which ever way you look at it, the men have to pay and yet get less time with the kids, the women have to get a job sometimes any job to support themselves and are at the will of their wayward H, with the payments coming on time.


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T2L is smart and energenic. She will land on her feet. I will say a prayer, tho.

I am glad she is attending school. In this economy everyone needs education/skills beyond high school.


Me; W 46
Him; H 46

2 girls
DD19
DD16
Dated/Married total 28 years.
..I am learning and working on myself.
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