Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 48 of 51 1 2 46 47 48 49 50 51
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by atena
Oh, ya, BBQ!!! I am meat!
Meaning I love it. Not that I want to be BBQed by Mel (only on the forum, that's ok). hurray

We do not BBQ eye-talians in Texas, silly! sigh I do make some MEAN pork ribs, though!! grin


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
update...I am in Ca looking for a job. I m visiting several venues.
My SIL lives in Ca and I am looking into venues in her area as well. She is not there now but she offered me to stay at her house and use her car. This will save me car rental money. My brother in law is working long hours so I will have minumum contact with him and her being away I will not even see.
Should I accept the offer?????
blessing


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
That sounds great! Can you drive a car? You know we drive on the RIGHT over here!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
of course I know!!! I have a TX license they might not like that here in CA. rotflmao

I just do not want to be too close to WH family, but his sister seems to be on my side consistently...I think she is trying to help. ANd her H hates my WH!
Blessing


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by atena
of course I know!!! I have a TX license they might not like that here in CA. rotflmao

SAY WHAT???? faint How did a silly eye-talian get a TEXAS drivers license!!?? MY LORD!! cry


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
I lived in Dallas, they trusted I could drive since I was eye-talian, they said if you can drive there you can drive even here in TX so they gave the license to me without even blinking flirt


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
faint Oh my!!!!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
p.s. we are having eye-talian food tonight in your honor, Atena! Digorno frozen pizza!! laugh


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
If someone takes me out for eye-talian food in here in Ca I will suggest we stay home and have a DiGiorno pizza... sick


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by atena
If someone takes me out for eye-talian food in here in Ca I will suggest we stay home and have a DiGiorno pizza... sick

It was delish!! kiss


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
atena, take the offer. It is WH problem not yours if your SIL is close to you.
How is the job hunt. Any good prospects?

I am an eye-talian driving in Texas also. I was just back east and packed my suitcase with bracoli-rabe and escarole because they don't have it here! Cooked it up already. yum


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
Ok, I am finally on a very dark plan B since I have not seen WH in 2 months now. I should be feeling better but I still miss him and think about him every single day. I know he is not worth it and he is no M material. He is an unrepentant WS in an active A.
Really, when does the pain end. I just talked to my mom and she said: "You could move to the Moon and you will still be thinking of him, you have to get him out of your heart because your heart comes with you wherever you go. If you do not do that it does not matter how far you go, you can't run from yourself."
crybaby


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
The longer you are away from him the less you will think of him. It has only been a few weeks.



"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Originally Posted by hope3343
I am an eye-talian driving in Texas also. I was just back east and packed my suitcase with bracoli-rabe and escarole because they don't have it here! Cooked it up already. yum

Another eye-talian and her foreign foods! crazy


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
Thank you Mel, it will take some time, I am so addicted to my "story" and WH! I think I find a weird comfort about being such a victim. In a way my all identity is build around the fact that my M ended because of an A!!
I need to get a life soon! He has moved on nicely and I am still stuck in (bad)memories lane.
blessing


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
I so hope you can get a job over here!


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
hi all, yes I really hope so!!
I am in 2 months plus in serious NC and dark plan B. I dream of WH every night and I can't stop thinking about him.
I still love him and I really hope that moving away will help me.
It has been 2 years now in an imperfect plan b (we work together) and he has not given me any sign of any repentance. Only total indifference. I believe he really never loved me at this point. It is so sad. 20 years of M with a man who could care less about me. And yet there were times in our M when I was sure he was in love with me.
blessing


atena
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985
Likes: 1
Atena, I know how much you must MISS being ignored, disrespected and abused for so many years. Remember the times he tormented you with his "friendships" with OW? And then gaslighted you and made you feel like you were some kind of freak when you expressed your concern? Told you that you were crazy when you expressed jealousy? What fun times!! crazy



"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
H
Member
Offline
Member
H
Joined: Dec 2008
Posts: 2,455
Hi Atena,

Any luck with the job market? Hope you have some good prospects...when do you go back overseas? Did you get to see your son?

You have to put your WH in perspective. I remember the man that I loved who is so far from the alien he is today. Until the OW is gone every particle of their being is gone.

Remember the old movie "The Body Snatchers" where people were replaced by soul-less pods? That is a WS.

I know my XH hates me because I screwed up his life (pretty sad but funny), because I fought in the D, I fought for my M, I fought for my family, I fought in the bankruptcy, and most of all because i did not roll over and die and rocked his fantasy world.

Stay dark and time will heal us one day.


Me 55, XWH 53, M 22 years
D17, D30
alien replaces my husband "I'm not happy" -7/08
Discover OW-8/08 (his direct report and I work there also)
H moves out 10/1/08, confront Ow 10/28/08
Plan B 1/09
D final 12/09

Quote: "First thing you do is pray; when there is nothing else to do, continue to pray."
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
A
atena Offline OP
Member
OP Offline
Member
A
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 1,769
Quote
Atena, I know how much you must MISS being ignored, disrespected and abused for so many years. Remember the times he tormented you with his "friendships" with OW? And then gaslighted you and made you feel like you were some kind of freak when you expressed your concern? Told you that you were crazy when you expressed jealousy?
I think the thing that bothers me the most is his attachement to OW. Was he an a$$ h@le only with me or is it the way he eventually becomes with every woman?
I am sure OW has no say about him having female friends and I know for a fact that he does have female friends now that he is no longer in the M. OW must be ok with it since she has no power over him (she is not his wife). So he must like that and think what a great person she must be compared to me who was so jealous. OW truly understands him and wants him just the way he is. This is what he is thinking..I am pretty sure. She looks so good to him compared to me and this is really disgusting...
blessing


atena
Page 48 of 51 1 2 46 47 48 49 50 51

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,116 guests, and 67 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5