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The point is that you are putting yourself in full view of alcohol (the MM) and expecting that staring at it, and wanting it, won't stop you from having it.

You have to have some SENSE.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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If that was true than he would have taken advantage of the situation that night but he didn't. He left. I had strong feeling for him by then

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He's gone and not interested in talking anymore

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And yet he keeps coming into contact with you. Eventually, he WILL want to "see you" again.

Move. Away.

NC for life.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Originally Posted by sunnysunshine
How do I forget him when I can't stop thinking about him? I'm trying to repair my marriage but I struggle with thinking about him. Kind advice needed.

You asked, we answered.

Omit him from your life.

No excuses, no 'but he doesnt want to see me'

(he always has a spare woman around - like you, and he likes this) And YOU want to see him.

You cannot wipe him from your thoughts while you still see him.

Each sighting of him sets your withdrawal back to day one.

You put your marriage and your childrens hearts at risk by ignoring your recovery.

Get your husband on here. Wonder what he thinks.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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She's not a believer.
I'm not sure what you mean by this. She's not a believer in what? Marriage? Adultery?


D-Day 2-10-2009
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Thank you Marriage Builders!

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He doesn't keep coming in contact with me. He doesnt feel the same. Never once said it. He said he doesn't believe it was an affair. He thinks just good friends who crossed the line. I told him it was more an EA for me

Last edited by sunnysunshine; 09/07/11 06:09 PM.
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I hope you aren't referring to religion.

Because then the reasoning would be..."She isn't a Believer and therefore it is ok for me to have had an affair with her h"

And also...you live HOW close to one another? Of course you will have contact.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Originally Posted by sunnysunshine
Again he is now seeing someone else. They were over a long time ago.
They're not over, though. They're still married. That's not over.


D-Day 2-10-2009
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Believer in Jesus

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So because she is not a believer in Jesus, it's OKAY for him to cheat on her?


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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They all say "It was just good friends who crossed a line."

EXPOSE this Sordid rotting thing to the public and then you can determine if it was an affair or not. I bet his reaction and that of the public would be quite interesting.

Is it destroying your marriage?
Did you give yourself to another man in your heart?
Would you do it in front of your husband?

If you can answer yes to at least one of these questions this it was an affair.

EXPOSE this to your family, OM's family, all children, neighbors, church pastors, and anyone else that would hold you accountable.


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Oh brother. U make it difficult. Only stated she's not Christian. I am and I never said it was ok to do what happened. We are not perfect like Jesus was.

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Teck he didn't. He left

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Originally Posted by sunnysunshine
Oh brother. U make it difficult. Only stated she's not Christian. I am and I never said it was ok to do what happened. We are not perfect like Jesus was.
So what was your point?


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Originally Posted by sunnysunshine
just good friends who crossed the line.


Wow, seriously what a scumbag.

He stabs his wife in the back, befouls his neighbours marriage by getting physical with his wife - and its 'just friends crossing the line!!!!!'

It is ADULTERY

And it was not an EA - it was Emotional and Physical .....

Yep - that's two knives in your husbands back

Speaking of believers, what do you and Mr Scumbag think about coveting a neighbour's wife/husband?

I believe that's a commandment....

And nowhere does it say

Thou shalt not covet they neighbours wife

....unless youre just good friends who crossed the line

.....unless POSOM's wife isnt a believer

......unless POSOW husband works late

.........unless we 'couldnt' 'hurt' the kids by moving schools, kept seeing each other and 'couldnt help' what happened next

or any other garbage justification excuse you can think of comes to mind....

Seriously GROW up, WAKE up and get this man out of your life.

Make your world a scumbag free universe and dedicate yourself to healing your husband of the enormous wrong, betrayal and deep wound you have caused him

RIGHT NOW NO EXCUSES.



What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

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But I don't really see him anymore and I'm trying to repair the damage.
You just saw him yesterday! 24 hours ago! What do you mean, 'you really don't see him anymore'??

You live next door to his wife and kids! Are you naturally obtuse, or do you think we're that gullible??

Last edited by maritalbliss; 09/07/11 06:29 PM.

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We both are and let me remind u, Jesus died for our sins. R u perfect. NO

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Didn't talk to him when I could of

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You have done wrong. If you want help, stop trying to deflect. Own up to what YOU have done WRONG.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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