I just read your thread and it looks like you are not following MB concepts.
You are probably in a false recovery.

agreed, if he still is in the same place you probably aren't going to see different results, he will just get better at hiding it...........
sorry but it is just a receipe for disater.

mommy, the condition that was conducive to your WH's multiple A's still remains. He is travelling alone on business trips. There was also limited exposure of his A's, so he didn't experience the full impact of exposure.

I am very concerned about this.

He did not have limited exposure. Every one knows. His parents were told, the church was told, my entire family was told. There was no limited exposure. The only thing was I did not meet the OW. We now live many states away.

As for business travel we do have new rules in place and he can't do his job and not travel. We do have a 5 to 7 yr plan in place for our own business. We talk and skpe on business trips. We also have a sex life so his needs are being met which they were not before. He also says no to travel and I have all his info and passwords and itnerary and such.

No I do not believe I am in any type of false recovery. We both know we were not meeting each others needs for many years that led to the affair. He was wrong for having the affair but we both work to make sure the conditions are not there for one to start again.

Tammy

This isn't about a singular affair .

This is about a behavioral pattern. You are caught up, a little, on saying that the ONS ( and there were so many) aren't that important. You are wrong. They show horrible boundaries - and potentially - even worse boundaries than an actual long term affair. There's usually a slope and justifications along the way to sex in a full fledged affair. But what your spouse has been doing - you better saddle up and pay attention.

He cannot have a traveling job. Not now, and not next week, and not ever.

You need to really read MB concepts. You need to see what's going on- you are headed for disaster- and no one here wants to see that.

Also? he chose to have many, many affairs.

You did not, and you were in the same marriage. quit giving more blame on yourself than is deserved- and look harder at what your spouse has CHOSEN to do.