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Yes. I have

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Originally Posted by NC4ME
I am hearing that he wants to end it but its a place to rest his head until I calm down where he can talk to me and see if theres anything to build with...LOST!

No...it is cake eating.

He has the OW...and he has you waiting in the wings.

Why are you waiting for him to make the decision???

He is incapable of making any decision that involves brain cells right now.

YOU make the decision!

committed

< it is like seeing a totally desperate person chanting "choose me...choose me" while frantically waving their arms...end rant>

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Im not waiting...Im going on with my life...

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Originally Posted by NC4ME
Im not waiting...Im going on with my life...


I must have missed the initial purpose of the thread...

and YOUR use of the word, "LOST"

led me to believe that you don't know which way to turn.

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I am lost but for my own self preservation am not wallowing in it. He sends ims implying his desire to return? But he just cant. People say because hes terrified of my verbal outburts and rejection....He should be terrified...Like I'd welcome him with open arms? Yea, lost...When do you just say enough is enough? And why should I be the one to ask for anything? Hes the one who needs to come to me...

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Originally Posted by NC4ME
I am lost but for my own self preservation am not wallowing in it. He sends ims implying his desire to return? But he just cant. People say because hes terrified of my verbal outburts and rejection....He should be terrified...Like I'd welcome him with open arms? Yea, lost...When do you just say enough is enough? And why should I be the one to ask for anything? Hes the one who needs to come to me...

Whoa.....

why the rant at me??

You initially posted
Quote
I just don't know what to do


Mel pointed you in the direction of Plan B and filing for divorce...

you came back at Mel with
Quote
MelodyLane-
Being that you are recovered 10 years why would youmake such a statement?


So...what's the question again?
Was there ever a question?

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This isnt for me

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Originally Posted by NC4ME
I am hearing that he wants to end it but its a place to rest his head until I calm down where he can talk to me and see if theres anything to build with...LOST!

Tell him to end his affair FIRST and then you can decide. He is not serious now because a) he has not ended his affair and b) he is far from committed to your marriage when he says he "wants to see if there is anything to build with..."

In other words, he wants to have more options for FLOP HOUSES. He wants you to be availabile to USE.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by NC4ME
Ok..So...Met with my spouses counselor and he Friday. He has been intherapy for 5 of the 8 mths he has been gone. Has not drank since January 1...BUT still living with other woman...more to story...any comments

On 4-11 you said he told you he drinks "a lot less." A which is it?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Have you attended AlAnon meetings?

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