On the Sunday I have them, always. And they love going - they ask me if we are going to church every time I see them. You'd think it would rub off on their mother but it doesn't. She is about as far away from the Christian upbringing she can get without murdering someone.

Exactly how long can I expect this "affair" to go on? She is still seeing this POS after at least two years, and knowing him for 3 1/2. I thought it was supposed to last 6 months, tops.

According to Dr Harley, 95% of affairs die a natural death within 2 years

I'll probably be the lucky stiff whose shearing wife falls in the 5%. She is still extremely resentful and angry, as evidenced in this recent text:

"Do you think you're God and that you're perfect and you do nothing wrong and you can just place blame on everyone but yourself?"

This after she accused me of brainwashing my kids after my 4 yr old said that my parents don't love them anymore. I don't know why she said that, because I never said any such thing to her. Anyway, I still have no clue what goes on in that woman's head. I don't think she will ever own up to anything. She lives her life her way with no regard to anyone else's feelings, and she makes sure she keeps her enabler friends around her to justify her behavior.

Sound EXACTLY like my ex-husband, only he thinks HE IS God

Did you respond to her text?
If not, i suggest you write the following: "I am willing to work with you to createa loving marriage but you must first end your affair"
(Send the above if you want to reconcile)

If you are willing to go no contact, Dont send a reply

Every communication is going to upset you so if I encourage you to 1. Follow Dr Harleys recommendation to go to no contact ....

Or if you insist on remaining in contact to go to Plan A.

I removed this post.

Jedi, I can't go no contact, I have no one to act as an intermediary, no one. I did respond to the text because she was accusing me of brainwashing them - something SHE has been engaging in from what I can tell. Again, more projection from the innocent adulterer.

What little contact I have had with her I have kept it neutral. She can still barely look me in the eye unless she is angry. I wouldn't even know how to Plan A with this creature.

Also, if I were to send that text, asking for reconciliation, she wouldn't even respond. If she did, it would be in the negative, and with a hateful tone.

Have the girls today and will be taking them back soon. When we were in the store my daughter ran up to the flower kiosk and said "Let's get mommy some roses." What the heck. $10 for a dozen roses to make my daughter happy, and to see what kind of reaction it gets. Stay tuned, but don't hold your breath. I'm certainly not.

What a cute daughter! And you can compliment your daughter on how thoughtful she is!

Blindside,

Instead of responding to her texts immediately, can you please post them here for suggested responses?

I agree with Jedi, if you post any texts/emails from WW we can help you with a response. Its important for your response to keep to the facts and not who any emotion ...you don't want to give her any ammunition she may use against you and you can't reason/educate a WS. As you probably already know waywards are very good at transferring the blame and projecting their own behaviour onto the BS.

Agree with Bluefin. Your daughter is sweet.

As far a text messages go, you should go dark. But since you cant find an IM, just delete them and don't respond. As it is, they are going to be ongoing daggers. Not fun. Not healthy.

How is your "invention" coming along. I am hoping that project will work out for you so you have some positives in your life. Glad you had a weekend with the kids. That's a blessing that you can count.

I am hoping circumstances will change so you can drop the Eeyore persona and become happier.

The only time she text me is when it has to do with the girls, and that is it. Half the time I don't even respond. I sometimes wonder if she is doing the same thing to me. We're Plan Bing each other and there's nothing happening.

Thanks of asking about the invention. I finally contacted a mechanical engineer that a friend of mine kept prodding me into talking to. He loves the idea and is working on it for me. I put fabrication on hold so he can work out some issues in SolidWorks that I was planning on doing in reality. He knows a lot of people and is pushing me toward going for some VC funding to get it going. He believes I will sell a lot more than even I think. If he is right, I'll probably be very well off in a short time. If that happens, I don't know if I could trust the xW if she told me she wanted to reconcile because her motive would be questionable.

What did you text in reply to her orihinal text?

Gosh, it was an exchange. You want me to transcribe the whole thing?

It would be very helpful to see for those of us offering our advice

Interestingly, my ex wifes affair has lasted nearly 2.5 years to date...

Your invention sounds really awesome. Keep working on it.

If you are worried about your Ex wanting possible recovery with you because of the money, you can always have her sign a pre-nup. This is something you can decide later on *if* things go that way.