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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
It's Battlestar Galactica (2004 series) that we never saw originally, but is available via Netflix. I don't want to abandon the show entirely because I want to know what is going to happen. We're almost 3/4 of the way through it. Nobody spill the beans if you've seen it!

We both talked with our coach today and I believe we have a way to handle it that will make us both feel closer.

FTF,
I think that over time, the movies, tv shows etc get better.
That has been my experience and I hope you will feel better over time also.

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Just wanted to post an update since I haven't posted in a while. Things are going so well for us right now. We are approaching the end of our one year accountability program. It is over at the end of this month. For whatever reason, that has coincided with things coming together nicely for us at the end.

About a month ago, it was as if a switch was flipped and suddenly my wife is the most wonderful person on Earth. I couldn't imagine life without her now and that makes it so much easier to want to make her happy in return. She is loving, empathetic, and we are now partners in life instead of adversaries. She actually WANTS to meet my emotional needs and I want to meet hers. We are now buyers in our marriage, and I can tell from her actions every day that what we have been doing is working. I don't want to ever go back to what we had before, and I don't think she does either.

I'm sure our coach Kim, Dr Harley, and the posters here would be the first to say that we were the ones who did the work. But it was the framework for success and encouragement along the way that gave us the tools and hope to get through it all and make our marriage better than it's ever been.

We'll never be done "working" on our marriage, but we've come a LONG way in the past year! So thanks to all.


Me (42)
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That's really great news, FTF, and I'm so happy for you and your wife. It's quite remarkable, isn't it, once that "switch gets flipped?" The marital relationship suddenly becomes wonderful and mutually rewarding. You look back at the past marriage, the one you thought was fine, and realize that, compared to the Buyer's MB marriage, it wasn't that great at all. That's how it is with us, too.

Your daughters are young enough to learn a lot from watching you two over the years of their growing up and hopefully bring it into their marriages.

Wishing you and FC all the best!


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WOW, FTF, that's great news! Thanks for sharing. I'm so happy for the both of you. laugh


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Congratulations, you guys. smile I am very happy to hear this!


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Congrats! It is so nice to hear from fellow MBers who are on the recovery road! Thanks for sharing.


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Originally Posted by LongWayFromHome
Your daughters are young enough to learn a lot from watching you two over the years of their growing up and hopefully bring it into their marriages.

We have one son and one daughter. Thanks for remembering them though. I just added them to my sig line. I hope to update the rest of it soon. Just a little afraid to put "recovered" on it just yet. But I'm thinking about it. smile


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awesome hurray

Thanks for sharing. Congratulations to you two and I'm so very happy for you two.

Please tell feuillecouleur good job, from me, for putting in the work.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
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Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
Originally Posted by LongWayFromHome
Your daughters are young enough to learn a lot from watching you two over the years of their growing up and hopefully bring it into their marriages.

We have one son and one daughter. Thanks for remembering them though. I just added them to my sig line. I hope to update the rest of it soon. Just a little afraid to put "recovered" on it just yet. But I'm thinking about it. smile

Oops! Sorry about my goof!

It took me over three years to decide to change my signature line to state "Recovered." And it was a really BIG deal to me when I finally clicked "Completely agree" to the Love Bank Inventory question "I have a feeling of romantic love toward my spouse." I didn't think that would ever happen after what he did...but it did.


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Quote
Please tell feuillecouleur good job, from me, for putting in the work.
Me too.


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I got a home made snowflake on my windshield this morning with the words "I Love You" written on it. blush

Stick with the program people!


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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
I got a home made snowflake on my windshield this morning with the words "I Love You" written on it. blush

Stick with the program people!
hurray dance2


FWW/BW (me)
WH
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Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
Originally Posted by LongWayFromHome
Your daughters are young enough to learn a lot from watching you two over the years of their growing up and hopefully bring it into their marriages.

We have one son and one daughter. Thanks for remembering them though. I just added them to my sig line. I hope to update the rest of it soon. Just a little afraid to put "recovered" on it just yet. But I'm thinking about it. smile

Oh and just in response to this. I came home yesterday and FC was helping our 7-year-old with his homework. I gave her a good kiss when I came in as I always do and our son inquired if we were "doing the tongue kiss". laugh

Yes, I know that's probably TMI. puke

But it does contrast rather sharply with my inquiry of my parents at that age as to why they NEVER kissed.

Children do notice more than we give them credit for.


Me (42)
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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
I got a home made snowflake on my windshield this morning with the words "I Love You" written on it. blush

Stick with the program people!

Aw! laugh

Here's a site where you can send her an electronic snowflake back. smile

http://snowdays.me/


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
Originally Posted by FightTheFight
Originally Posted by LongWayFromHome
Your daughters are young enough to learn a lot from watching you two over the years of their growing up and hopefully bring it into their marriages.

We have one son and one daughter. Thanks for remembering them though. I just added them to my sig line. I hope to update the rest of it soon. Just a little afraid to put "recovered" on it just yet. But I'm thinking about it. smile

Oh and just in response to this. I came home yesterday and FC was helping our 7-year-old with his homework. I gave her a good kiss when I came in as I always do and our son inquired if we were "doing the tongue kiss". laugh

Yes, I know that's probably TMI. puke

But it does contrast rather sharply with my inquiry of my parents at that age as to why they NEVER kissed.

Children do notice more than we give them credit for.

Love it! Sounds like you guys are headed for a very merry Christmas.


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Originally Posted by FightTheFight
I got a home made snowflake on my windshield this morning with the words "I Love You" written on it. blush

Stick with the program people!
I am more pleased of hear of your happiness than I can say. hug


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Just thought I'd post an update on our progress. We are still doing very well since finishing our year of accountability coaching about a month ago. Negotiation is so easy for us to accomplish now and we just naturally do it.

Another observation is that when we do make mistakes with each other, they are much easier to recover from. It's amazing how having a bit of a balance in each other's account keeps these little things from seeming so large. Grace and goodwill are natural when you have healthy love bank balances.

Even some of the more overarching problems we face don't seem so bad because I know we are both working together to solve them. Life is a lot easier when you are teammates and not adversaries.

Just haven't posted much lately and thought some might be wondering. smile


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Excellent update, FTF. Good for you and fc!!


Me: BW, 57 fWH: 63 (Taffy1) Serial cheater
Presently on the Recovery Road, in the Online program.
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hurray awesome


FWW/BW (me)
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Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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I love updates!

Originally Posted by FightTheFight
Negotiation is so easy for us to accomplish now and we just naturally do it.

Imagine that! Congrats and best wishes for a great 2015.

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