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Are you accounting for all your time, do you still go out without her, spend any nights apart?

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Have you read the Basic Concepts and Coping wih Infidelity series?

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Lawyers costs, treatment costs.. all of which I told her I would take responsibility for.. she has full access to my phone records. OW lives in different town. Met her in an outpatient program which I have been done with..

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Yes I'm accounting for all my time.. I let her know where I'm going what I am doing, who I am with

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I will ask her if she'd like to go do something fun.. no relationship talk.. just fun

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Yes I've read those series.. it wouldn't hurt to do it again. But yes I've read them

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How far away does the OW live,? You met her in alcohol treatment?

( all of your posts are light on details and skip half the questions asked. No one expects a novel, but this is frustrating to drag every little bit of info out of you. )

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"Do you have any female friends?

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10-15 miles away.. female friends, not really... just mutual friends of my wife's.. yes met the OW in an alcohol treatment class... sorry if I don't answer everything right away

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Is your wife willing to come and post here? We could provide a lot of help and support to her.

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Originally Posted by Jer533
I did not yet sorry. We got dumped on with snow so I went out to our house and plowed everything out for her..

This is why apples referred to you wanting the easy fix, which you adamantly denied.

We got dumped on with snow too over the last weekend. I still managed a long date with my husband and checking into some threads on here for support.

If you are serious about saving your marriage, there are no excuses for not doing everything that is suggested to you.

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Originally Posted by Jer533
If you were to list it numerical.. these have been done..
1,2,4,5,was doing 6 by she told me she didn't want me to.., 7 she takes care of finances so she sees everything, 8&10 are hard because she has no interest in being around me and I'm not living at the house currently 11 I asked her if she want d to put my phone whereabouts on her phone so she could see where I am at all times.. again she has no interest in that.. all that should know do know if this
I see you blocked all communication with OW, but you should change all your contact information to show you are serious.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Originally Posted by Jer533
I just tried to listen to the radio clips.. opened up into an error screen

Did you try on a computer or from your phone?


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Jer533 Offline OP
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I asked her on Monday night if that when the holidays are over and I line someone up to watch the boys if she'd like to go out and catch a comedy show or go do something fun we both have never done? She's like "together"??? I said yes, together.. just fun, no relationship talk.. she didn't say no.. but she didn't say yes..

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Jer533 Offline OP
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I will send her a link.. no guarantees she'll come though..

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Understood

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I tried on my phone.. I will try on computer this wknd when I'm at our house

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That link was posted 8 days ago. "Just compensation" is a way to show your wife that you are serious and not just BSing. Asking her to go out and have fun when you aren't showing any effort to provide just compensation is just proving to her that you are NOT serious. Can you try Dr. Harley's method? I'll bet she's either terrified or angry at your suggestion to go out and have fun, you have can't "nice" your way out of this. You're also showing us that you are not serious about change. 8 days, sir, 8 days

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Jer533 Offline OP
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I am sober.. I recently received my 6 month medallion.. I do not blame with wife for what I did.. the girl I was with was not underage.. I'm an addict not a sicko.. I did loose my license for a period of time. I stayed with my mom so she could drive me to work..

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I'm spending the wknd at our house due to the weather, our dog having surgery and she needed at break.. she made it clear to me that she didn't want me getting mixed signals cause she's letting me spend the wknd here.. I told her to not worry that I am just grateful to be able to be here...

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