My partner and I have been working through the marriage builders concepts, and they have been really effective. We have made a commitment to resolve things together, dealt with the love busters, and begun to negotiate issues as they come up in a fairly effective, peaceful way.

But we have an issue that I don't understand or recognise from any of the basic MB information. There is an intangible sense of incompatibility - a difficulty relaxing around each other. It is as though there is something in her energy that makes me awkward and uncomfortable. It can give me a sense of passion, but not peace.

So for example i can't sleep when i am next to her, and she can hug me and i feel not comforted, but stressed.

Does anyone have any idea how to deal with such intangible invisible issues? It is very difficult to negotiate about something that we can't even really put out finger on...

Thanks,
Alexander

Are you married? How long have you known each other?

Is there abuse in either of your pasts?