My husband had an affair last year before he he left his home country. The woman claims that the fathe of her twins is my husband. The twins were born on Aug 20, 2020. My husband left his home country on Nov 8, 2019. According to the woman, she gave birth on the 40th week. Is it possible that my husband is the father of the twins?

Welcome to MB.

We can't give you information about whether the children were born in the 40th week or not. The point that you should be concerned about is that your husband must tell you the truth about when this affair really ended, and you must have a way of knowing that there has been no contact from that date going forward. If the dates do not line up in your mind, how do you know that he didn't sneak back there, or that she didn't visit over here, after the date you know about?

Your husband must tell you the truth about the affair, but he should not discuss paternity with this woman. If she wants to claim child support from him, leave her to get a court-ordered and court-supervised DNA test. And whether or not she gets one, your husband should have no contact with her while he remains married to you.

What about you, though? Do you want to stay married, knowing that he had this affair? If the woman is ever able to prove that the children are his, would that make a difference to you?

Do you have children of your own? How long have you been married? Why was your husband in his home country without you? Is he in the habit of going there alone? If he goes there again, you should know that face-to-face contact will happen again.

I am sure he didn’t went back to his hime country after he arrived on Nov 8, 2019. I have his passport all the time. That is the reason it’s giving me a doubt that they are his children. The woman is always contacting him to provide financial support.

We are married for 7 years and no children of our own. We were working on the fertility treatment when I found out in September.

I think that paternity is not a question that you can answer without a DNA test, and he absolutely should not take one unless a court orders him to do so.

How does this woman contact him? She should not have any means of reaching him so that the affair can properly end. And does he provide any financial support when she asks? If he's supporting these kids and he does not even know that they are his, you'd better believe that he is heavily into this woman.

A much more important issue than whether he is the children's father is the fact that he had an affair at all. You seem remarkably un-bothered about this. You didn't answer my questions about why he was abroad without you or whether he will travel alone again.

How long has this affair been going on? How did they meet?

This happened when we had marital issue 2018-2019. He was living in his home country until Nov 2019 when he decided to be here in the US.

The affair is about a year. Not sure how she met the girl.

Yes, he is giving financial support at times, but most of the time no.

The woman is actually threatening him, reason why he is giving them financial support.

So we are thinking right now to get a paternal DNA test for the peace if mind of everyone.

It's not easy to understand the history from what you have written.

The affair was about a year long. Did he leave you and go back to his country for a whole year? Why did he go back there - that was a bit drastic. Why did he go back to your country?

You only seem to be concerned about the paternity of these children. You don't seem to want to examine the fact that your husband left you, had an affair, and is now supporting someone else's kids. You don't seem to want to discuss why are you staying with him in these circumstances.

In addition to SugarCane’s questions. Have you exposed this affair to anyone?

I'm an old OB nurse and still have my obstetrical wheel safely tucked away in a filing cabinet. I agree that DNA testing, as ordered and supervised by the court, is your best option, but after looking at the wheel, I will tell you several things you that might be useful for you to know. (1) It's not unheard of. It's not impossible. It has happened before and will doubtless happen again. Twins CAN be born at 40 weeks, but it is unusual for them to go full term. It is more likely than not that the twins were 36-37 weeks when they were born than that they were carried the full 40 weeks. (2) If they actually turned 40 weeks ON August 20, their date of conception should've been November 27 or 28 and the date of her last menstrual period, November 12. (3) If he left the country on November 8, and impregnated her the last day he was in the country, it would move her due date back to August 1st, and I have never heard of a twin gestation which went almost 43 weeks. Would doctors even allow that? (3) The alleged length of gestation and the day of conception being 20 days after he was gone from the country (says the wheel, anyway) seem to make it unlikely that he's the father of the babies. You should follow the good advice you've gotten and get the proof through scientific testing, but on the basis what she's told you so far, at this point I'm skeptical about it being the truth. (4) If you google "pregnancy due date calculator," you can put August 20, 2020 in the due date box, and it will let you calculate backwards to the date of conception. I picked the one from medcalc.com, right at the very top of the google list.

tl