I am a Born Again Believer and yet I am in so much paint I can hardly bear it. I have been experiencing severe pain in my chest off and on for about 3 and half months over this whole situation with my husband leaving, committing adultry and then leaving her and moving back to where we live. I am having trouble sleeping without sleeping pills and I tried an Anti-depresent and it gave me worse anxiety so I am trying to get it out of my system now. I don't want to die, I just don't want to live right now.

Suz,

Maybe plan B is not Gods plan for you right now?

Father,

Please reveal to Suz if there is anything you would have her do differently.

Bring your words to her mind to guide her, by your Spirit.

Lead her in a plain path Father.

Thank you for what you are doing in her husbands heart today. I pray that you will reconcile him to yourself.

Shul

Suz,

If your husband has moved backed this is a good thing and I praise God for it. It took my husband almost 4 years to move back in with us.

You are hurt and you are having trouble forgiving him. I know it hurts but forgivness is the only thing that will ease your pain. Unforgivness and bitterness hurts us and separates us from God. Don't get me wrong ,I know you have more than enough reasons to be hurt and not want to forgive.

You should be showing your husband the love of Christ right now, and Plan B can keep you from doing that. He has left the OW, praise God. See God in all this. We don't deserve forgivness either, but Jesus forgave us anyway.

Give your tears to the Lord. Go to Him with everything. Trust that He is working. You can already see He is working in your situation, many don't have that. Ask God to help you forgive your husband and the OW. We can only forgive with God's help.

Please go to this site. God sent me here and it is were I learned how to forgive. www.restorem.org

gentle

Gentle: Thanks for your guidance. I should clarify that my husband has not moved back home yet. He has his own apartment 15 minutes from where I live. He has not contacted me for three weeks this Tuesday. I have been advised to not call him, to let him think this through. This is why it is so hard, I want to call him and tell him again and again I forgive him, and that we can work on our 23+ year marriage. He turned on a dime about 6 weeks ago and said he had changed his mind, didn't want to work on reconcillation etc. I told him you know where I am if you change your mind, I love you and I will let you go and I will pray for you. I have left him totally in the Lord's hands. This is why it is painful. It is good to release him to the Lord completely, just hard to do, but I believe God's word and I know that God is at work and I have to wait to see when the breakthrough comes. I hold no bitterness, and if it tries to rise up I confess it and ask God to take it. I continue to ask the Lord to fill me with love compassion and understanding for my husband. Blessings Suzcares

Shul: Thanks for your words of encouragement and guidance. I continue to ask the Lord when and if I am to contact him or if I am to wait for him first. My husband is hiding right now, he is not working on any relationship, not even with our grown daughters and son who want to hear from him. He is working long hours and hiding out. I was being hurt so much by what he was saying to me in his confusion, shame and pain, so I took Plan B to protect myself and to give God time to work in him alone. It is hard to do, but I have been advised to do this even though it is so hard. He has a ministry leader that will be in contact with him again that he agreed to met with about 5 weeks ago. They had coffee. I believe my husband is going through withdrawl and that he is lamenting about losing the job he loved to do in ministry. So to be in contact with him right now just feels like I would hear more of the things that are hurtful and I don't want to risk saying something that would be hurtful back, so I am giving him some space and continuing to pray. I am also asking the Lord to show me exactly what to do, when to do it etc. My church and ladies Betrayed Heart support group is standing in prayer and intersession with me, as are coveant keepers group. Hope this explains it better, it is hard, so very hard because we did everything together and considered each other as best friends until this crisis came into his life at 53. If I pursue him I feel he will just shut down, so I need to give him time to find himself, because he keeps saying he is not the same person, and I understand because the Gary and husband I knew would not have done such a selfish thing. So I must excercise my faith and wait.Tonight at church we had much prayer and breakthrough was the word given to those who went forward for prayer, so I am finding confirmation again.
Blessings
Suzcares