How is everybody this morning? <P>My morning is going good so far, tired, but my 3rd cup of coffee is helping that.<P>The first thing that came to me when I got on the forum is thta My Life doesn't have to be My Marriage and My Marriage doesn't have to be My Life. The more sources of comfort and happiness you have surrounding you, the better chance of finding comfort and happiness when things start going wrong.<P> <P>My evil twin is still dormant today.

The first thing I thought of was "oh God, another day!" I'm tired of thoughts of my H consuming my day. I'm tired of my mom trying to hover over me. I'm tired of not being able to see my H. I'm tired of not being able to talk to him when I want to. I'm tired of trying to take care of 3 children by myself. <P>So, "I'm tired" just about sums it up!<P>Mitzi

Once again, me and Mitzi are "twins".<P>The first thing I thought of was "oh God do I have to do this again today". Why is this happening to me. <P>Yes I am tired of taking care of 3 kids alone too (plus 5 daycare). Lord help us all get through this!<BR>

I got up this morning, thought how sweet it was for my husband to get up before me, and check the news to see if school was cancelled due to weather. Then I looked out the window, and thought darn....It's not bad enough. It would have been nice to stay home with him.

HUGS<P>{{{{{{{Mitzi}}}}}}}<P>{{{{{{{Lonelymom}}}}}}}<P>Beth 28 - sounds like your doing okay, even if school wasn't cancelled.

My first thought of the day was how nice it was to feel my 4 yr. old poking me in the eye to wake me up.....then I realised that I am 32 years old today and that every crow's foot and grey hair has been earned....and I feel beautiful this morning......<P>I have coffee.....it's a lovely snowy day here in Quebec, Canada, and no matter what my H has done, my life is just that...,MY LIFE, and I will no longer lay blame at his feet....I am taking control ....that is my birthday present to me.....<P>no more wallowing...no more pity parties...as of today, my destiny is firmly in my hands..<P>I am responsible for my happiness...ME and no one else....<P>It is so far past the time to start being grateful for life and every blessing in it...even the blessing of just waking up in the morning....and knowing there is another day for me to shape into a piece of my destiny...<P>there are such atrocities that go on in the world, I'm sure I don't need to list them...and somewhere, in some war-torn country where people cannot even eat let alone survive a week, where if their spouse were cheating, it might be a good thing, because at least they would know their spouse is alive.....there is a person who would gladly trade places for my supposed crappy life.....<P>I will never forget: It could always be much, much, worse...<P>so, happy birthday to me, I am responsible for me.....from hereon in...<P>Dylan

Happy Birthday soulloss.<P>I have made a resolution for the day. I will not think of me in a "feel sorry for myself" sort of way at all today. I'll start with only today so I might succeed.<P>I will think about me in a "what can make me feel good about myself" sort of way and I will think about the needs of my children without feeling pressured or resentful. <P>I also plan on keeping my "situation" out of the mix and see what happens.<P>Wish me luck.

The first thing I thought of this morning, was, oh no, I have to go upstairs and work out again? Yuck! But seriously, I thought about how happy I'm becoming and my life is no longer a wreck. <P>However, I also thought that I need to seriously consider withdrawaling out of my school semester. I can focus on Algebra right now. My first and foremost mental efforts want to and need to go towards my marriage, and my life, and my H. <P>As much as I feel like I'm letting myself down, I know I don't want a bad grade on my transcript. It's hard enough going back to school after all these years, but I never forsaw THIS problem! <P>So far so good... that wraps it up in a nutshell. <P>Essyboo - thanks for asking! <P>--purplemag

My first thought when I woke up was of what had happened, but then I realized I had slept for 6 dreamless hours and was actually awake for the first time in a long time. Spent couple hours last night before bed writing in a journal so I dumped all my feelings and thoughts out and I had an excellent night's sleep. Might have to make a habit of that. Invited Cat to dinner tonight w/ me and the kids, but she is trying to turn me down. <BR>Roasted Pork Tenderloin<BR>Pasta salad<BR>Louisiana Rice and Beans<BR>Caesar Salad<BR>Any one else interested? LOL<P>------------------<BR>Allen<BR>sparky_dog_mb@yahoo.com

I'm feeling kinda stressed, anxious and weird today. MIL called and started pumping me for info about my upcoming vacation. I am going to see my best friend in St. Louis for a week and leaving the kids with H. She just acted weird. I pick up on stuff and I definately felt something. She asked if we had told the kids about getting divorced yet and I said no, that H wouldn't talk about it. She said she thought we should tell them soon. I agreed. She hasn't once acted like she was sad about any of this. I'm wondering if maybe she's glad it's happened. Maybe she's never really liked me. I guess this is called paranoia. Arghh!!!!<P>------------------<BR>Blessed be.<BR>****************<BR>Keridwen<P>Keridwen_7@yahoo.com

I am exhausted and mentally drained! So much has happened between H and I over the weekend that I am going to need a month to get it straight in my head. So much anger and confusion...<BR> <P>Negative feelings this morning! Another day of no money to pay the bills, phone ringing off the hook from bill collectors, I hate the business I have begun! I mean, seriously.... Who would actually want to sell Fax and Copier Toner and Printer Ink Cartridges all day? Anyone? Come on.... raise your hands!! LOL <P>Then I remembered that I get to go see my 10 year old play the violin in a concert at school this morning. Finally, a smile came to my face. So I am ridding myself of the negativity and looking at the bright side of things today..... <P><p>[This message has been edited by Lacee (edited February 23, 2000).]

My first thought: I wish I could swap my dreaming life for this one. What a mess.

My first thought was that I hadn't got enough sleep! I watched the clock from 3am on. <P>I also thought about how hopeless my situation is and how much things can really change in a matter of months. <P>Sorry...it's a really bad day!!

ARGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! SCREAM!!! Gnashing of teeth! <P>Well, you did say to post the first thing that came to mind didn't you? <P>Wow, I feel better already...<BR>Kathi

My first thought today, was - did I oversleep? We were up almost the entire night the night before, (SD didn't come home for 4 nights - and she finally showed up in the wee hours Tuesday morning.... she's 16).<P>And I thought - it is amazing that we are dealing with so many issues, and handling life hour by hour. When will life be predictable and normal again?<P>And, I thought "I must be sure not to show any facial expressions that show my thoughts... big LB" What I wanted to do when I saw SD come downstairs was spit on her.<P>She missed the bus and my husband ended up taking her to school. <P>So, anyways - that is how my day started. RESTRAINT!!!!!<P>TNT

MMMMMM!!!!Pasta. *sob, sob* I miss it. Oh well.

My first thought of the day was that I woke up and found that it was the first night I had slept thru MOST of the night in a long time and felt at peace with GOD and myself.<P>Happy Birthday Soulloss. I love your post. Carpe Diem!!<P>Got a date tonight with Lor, so am feeling excited about that.<P>"I fear not, for God has given me a spirit of Power, of Love, and Sound Mind. God is on my side." II Timothy 1:7<P>The Sound Mind part is a toughy.<P>Lor, I'm going to give you that dream life, and much more. I love you. ;-)

First thing tha came to mind?<BR>"what a wondefull sunny day" Although I didn't sleep enough hours tonight I did wake up rested and ready for everything the day will bring.<BR>Kat

ok I'm posting this before reading any of the replys here....I think the energy from the board today is GREAT every seems to be on a good day at once today.<BR>Lesa

ok soooo maybe I should fo read first....to my dearest friend mitzi I am so sorry you are in the dip of the coster...why have you not called or Emailed me to let me know....{{{{{mitzi}}}}}<BR>{{{{{lonelymom}}}}}}I'm sorry for your hurt as well<BR>Allen,<BR>I'll be right up for dinner should get there around 3:30 or so... <BR>Lesa<P>------------------<BR>"Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and<BR> lean not unto thine own understanding." -Proverbs 3:5<BR>Take care and God Bless.<P> lms20ish@jobe.net