My best friends husband just confessed to having an affair. Everytime she tells him how she feels; he brings up past situations that made him feel bad. He is also on an emotional roller coaster and he can not sleep at night. Why? Why does he feel like she should say she was wrong? Why is he on the roller coaster and should she care?

inlove2,<P>Good question...<P>Your friend's husband is now being racked with <B>guilt</B>...<P>If the affair isn't over... (you didn't mention that or not)... that guilt is even more powerful.<P>The way your friend's H is handling this is by having his W <B>share</B> in the blame....<BR>...by admitting her congtribution to what lead him to his infidelity.<P>If you read about <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3000_intro.html" TARGET=_blank>MB Concepts</A>...<BR>...most (not all affairs) start with some measure of "contribution to the failures of the marriage" (from both parties)!<BR>...in having some <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3300_needs.html" TARGET=_blank>Emotional Needs</A> not being met.<P>What to do?...<BR>...counseling for both your friend and her H.<BR>...perhaps a medical review for your friend's H (stress induced problems!)<P>Should she care...<BR>...yep... for the recovery of her marriage.<P> <P>Jim<p>[This message has been edited by NSR (edited August 21, 2000).]

thank you jim for responding . i am sending this url to my friend. <P>------------------<BR>I LIKE HAPPY ENDINGS!