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#55113 12/07/99 09:19 PM
Joined: Dec 1999
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hope123 Offline OP
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How do I get spouse to a marriage counselor?

#55114 12/08/99 10:17 AM
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Hope,<P>You cannot make someone else do or want to do something. Here is what I suggest.<P>Go to your husband and tell him that you really want to make your marriage work. Tell him that you recognize that the problems you both face are too big to handle alone. Tell him that you want to go to couseling with him because you see that as being the best chance for saving your marriage. Tell him that you want him to go too but you will go alone if he won't accompany you.<P>Go to couseling without him. After each session tell him (in general terms) about what YOU are learning. When you talk about the couseling session DO NOT ask him to go with you. Just continue to bring back the reports. Over time he may become curious enough to go with you. <P>At all times when talking with your husband about this be careful to not be attacking in word or TONE. When you tell him you are going to couseling without him he needs to hear that you desparatly want to save your marriage not that you are mad at him for not going. You may need to practice this in front of a mirror. <P>Go to couseling. If nothing else it will help you cope with the pain of this seperation and may help you determine if there is indeed any hope for reconciling.<P>I wish you all God's best.<BR>


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