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Joined: Jul 2000
Posts: 656
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cjack Offline OP
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Joined: Jul 2000
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Have you ever had one of those conversations where someone drops a bomb in the middle, almost in passing, and you hardly notice? Well, I had one of those today.<P>One year ago, I found pictures of my then-wife and Steve. A month later, she moved out. In February, one day after Valentine's Day, our divorce was final. <P>Today, she called to complain about some minor issue with our daughter. She berated me for something pretty minor, and then took me to task for being in a bad mood yesterday. I've been kind of down for the last couple of weeks, remembering what I was going through last year at this time (lies, deception, phone calls to OM, etc.) had me feeling depressed and uncommunicative. <P>So I haven't been terribly nice to her lately. Not mean, just distant. I know, what an odd way to act toward your X!<P>Anyway, in the middle of her long, rambling tirade, she says "well, its been a year now, and since Steve's out of my life now, I thought maybe we could talk about maybe dating or something, you know, seeing if there was anything left for us, but now I guess I won't bother."<P><BR>Yeah, my jaw hit the floor and bounced right back up over my nose!<P>So now the question is...now what?<BR>

Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 2,289
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Joined: Oct 2000
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It's your choice - do you want to date her? <P>If you do - ask her out - if you don't - don't ask her.<P>Simple as that.<P>It's all up to you now... what can you handle?<P>Blessings

Joined: Feb 2001
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Wow! Great timing, huh? Still within the two years though... Are you still interested in trying? Take care of yourself whatever you do.

Joined: Nov 2000
Posts: 273
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Congratulations!!!<P>I say leave her alone for a while. She needs to learn about being alone. She needs time to grow up. She needs the time you had alone to learn. She needs to learn to make herself happy, because if someone is dependent on someone else for their happiness, bad things happen. IMHO, of course.<P>I had a similar encounter recently. My mouth was wide open. I was divorced April 16th. My daughter had a birthday on June 25th. My XW (cheater, liar) went to the daycare and took a big cookie for my daughter and the other kids. (nice) Something went down and my X left saying that she would never come back. She made a scene. I tried to talk to her the next afternoon at the daycare's request, but it turned out badly. That night, she called. That conversation was only a little better. She is such a pain. The next evening she called to APOLOGIZE!!! She apologized twice. She said that she wasn't going to cause any problems anymore and hoped that I would find someone "special". She's been fine since then, but is still with the OM. My female apartment neighbor (our daughters play together) said that she must want something. I'll see in time I guess. The next morning I got a 13K raise and a fortune cookie saying good things are coming my way!!! Still, my jaw dropped when she called to apologize. I didn't want to answer when her name popped up on my cellphone's caller ID.<P>Damn it's nice to have things going so good. I've learned to really appreciate it while it lasts as some crap is usually just around the corner.<P>May the force be with you. ;-)<P>Kevin


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