Well, after a month of sitting on the fence, H left a half hour ago to his apartment. He said he still isn't sure about what he is doing.He went to talk to a priest this morning. He told him he didn't want to hurt anyone so he wasn't sure what to do. However, he negleted to tell the priest that one of these people was his wife,"he didn't wanted it to be slanted to one side".Am I missing something here?He is really angry with God for not giving him the answers he wants. I had posted before that he thought God told him the affair was alright. My h is an intelligent man its so hard to believe he can rationalize this way.He took a sleeping bag, a lamp, his book some soda and pretzels (I packed him some cookies and bread that I had made him). He says he just wants to be alone.However. ow lives nearby so I really doubt it. That's it for now. Thanks for listening. This is such a great group. If any of you have any insight , please share. Actually, I feel better now that it has happened. I'm sure it will hit me later.

Hi Noel,<BR> Hang in there, your H sounds very confused, very typical....why is it they all seem to go through the same thing? Don't lovebust, give him his space.......are you still in communication? Lu<BR>

Lu, He just left so I'm not sure if we're in communication. WE were talking up untill he left. He doesn't have a phone in his apartment yet. But he does have his cell phone and I have his number. But I think I'll just leave him alone. He said he'll come back tomorrow or Sunday and we'll talk.

Just hang on honey. You will be amazed, parts of it are horrible but parts of it are better. The OW/affair won't be in your face anymore, that will be a little easier to handle. Just try and keep yourself busy, read a book, watch a movie, move furniture, visit with friends. And remember, you always have us.<P>------------------<BR>A.K.A.<BR>PondVJ

Noel,<BR>I just wanted to let you know that i know what you mean about God approving of the affiar. My h. went so far as to say God had showed him ow was his perfect soulmate and that he would be with her in his next life. I was a mess for months wondering if this could <BR>possibly be true. No way. Its just a way for them to make themselves feel better about a situation that they must know somewhere in the depths of their heart is wrong. My h. is very confused too. In my case, ow died. So affair is over but the turmoil we are both in now is pure torture. We're trying to rebuild but he is so wrapped up in his pain that he seems incapable of feeling mine. Personally, I think he is having a mid-life crisis. I will pray for you. Take care.<BR>Hurtingwife