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#773820 07/01/04 09:58 PM
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Are you a CUAO? Just wondering. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

#773821 07/01/04 11:03 PM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by justthewife:
<strong> Are you a CUAO? Just wondering. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">What's with all of the TLA's an other acronyms?

Tony
Certified EIEIO

#773822 07/01/04 11:57 PM
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Hey, you aren't a girl! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

LOL.... Not explaining this one! Rules girls know who they are.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Iffin I wassa callin you I wouldda said - Here piggy, piggy, piggy....

<frantically searches to find out what TLA is>

#773823 07/02/04 12:25 AM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by justthewife:
<strong> Hey, you aren't a girl! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I like girls...

I have a little girl of my own...

Tony

#773824 07/02/04 07:17 AM
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CUAO ??
Certified UnAbridged Organizer?

Do I WANT to be a Rules Girl? If you're one, it might be fun...

#773825 07/02/04 08:02 AM
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you should have called! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

#773826 07/02/04 10:12 AM
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I might be in training. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

#773827 07/02/04 10:19 AM
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I feel so lost. I don't know what a Rules girls is, or the acronyms used. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />
How will I ever learn all the MB acronyms and these? Oh My!

#773828 07/02/04 10:29 AM
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Lions and tigers and piggies... OH MY!

No sweat newly sweetie... I'm sneaking in a non MB TLA.

TLA = Three Letter Acronym (Thanks Tony)

Jan, it was like 1 am. I was freaking needlessly anyway.... You would have just fallen back to sleep as I rambled!

Everybody should be a Rules Girl! And yes, it is fun. Mega fun. Shall we hold a mini seminar? A MB to CUAO kinda thang? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> That would be fun!

Ok....
</font>
  • <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">CUAO - a Creature Unlike Any Other</font></li>
  • <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Rules Girl - Gal that follows The Rules</font></li>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
Ok, so some people think it can be manipulative - but IMHO it's just the same as Plan A/B.

I'm sure you've heard of it... the book that gives gals 987 easy steps to catchin and keepin your man? ISBN 0-446-60274-4

Shall I ramble on or no interest?

#773829 07/02/04 10:39 AM
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oops! Sorry GG - meant to address you when I said shall we hold a seminar... and Avondale sorry, was telling you yes it is fun.

E
<being careful to not leave anyone out because Amanda had a hard day at camp yesterday>

#773830 07/03/04 12:13 AM
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Hmm. A seminar? I love it!

I did the Surrendered Wife thing before I landed here. My sister is doing Surrendered Dating and combining it with The Rules.

Now, obviously in the seminar we'll have a lecture, and some time for class participation. I'd like to suggest a practical element as well. We'll need men to experiement on.

Let's see.... Shall we make a list of MB DV men who we can test the techniques on???

#773831 07/03/04 12:28 AM
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Well, GG, should we hold the seminar at your house or mine???
I have so much to learn about dating.
I'm going out tonight to test my flirting in New Hope. And yes, GG, I know that 90% of the men there are gay - but that makes it safe doesn't it?

#773832 07/02/04 01:17 PM
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Better than safe, Newly. You can ask them for tips

#773833 07/02/04 01:30 PM
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Just make sure you're asking the right one for tips! Remember L&B and the ball's in his court.

If he wants you - great, if he doesn't - NEXT!

We can't use the guys here. We'd ruin them for all other women. Besides, MB dating is not a strong sell for me.... BTDT.... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I'm practicing on Chicago. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

#773834 07/02/04 01:43 PM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by justthewife:
<strong> Lions and tigers and piggies... OH MY!

No sweat newly sweetie... I'm sneaking in a non MB TLA.

TLA = Three Letter Acronym (Thanks Tony)

Jan, it was like 1 am. I was freaking needlessly anyway.... You would have just fallen back to sleep as I rambled!

Everybody should be a Rules Girl! And yes, it is fun. Mega fun. Shall we hold a mini seminar? A MB to CUAO kinda thang? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> That would be fun!

Ok....
</font>
  • <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">CUAO - a Creature Unlike Any Other</font></li>
  • <font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Rules Girl - Gal that follows The Rules</font></li>
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">

Ok, so some people think it can be manipulative - but IMHO it's just the same as Plan A/B.

I'm sure you've heard of it... the book that gives gals 987 easy steps to catchin and keepin your man? ISBN 0-446-60274-4

Shall I ramble on or no interest? </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">When the book came out, I was in Barnes and Nobel and some sorority girls came in to get a copy of The Rules. They were dismayed to find it was an actual book-they were looking for a sheet of paper.

I skimmed through it and discovered I had broken at least 3 while courting H. He married me anyway.

I'm actually old enough to remember a time when girls were taught those rules, especially the one about not accepting a date for Saturday if he called later than Wednesday. I think being drilled in the Rules was what led my generation to revive feminism.

<small>[ July 02, 2004, 01:51 PM: Message edited by: elspeth ]</small>

#773835 07/02/04 05:49 PM
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That's funny El... Oh sure, there's no way to be perfect about it. I think that not calling him even when he calls and leaves a voice mail is rude, with my schedule it's impossible to tell if I'm going to be home or running... and I turn off the phone when it's time for the kids to turn in.

You're quite a catch though! Even if you broke all the rules and picked your nose too he would have proposed! You are a fab creature!

I think the rules are empowering. You don't base your worth on what every date thinks of you, and you build your own self esteem. It also levels the playing field a bit - I don't feel like I'm at the mercy of some fellows whim.

And it's teaching a bit of restraint to me. I'm the type to lay my heart on the line, get attached, and trompled like an ant at an elephant party.

Not pretty! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

One of my problems was telling the whole [censored] fell offa building story at the drop of a hat, sometimes before going out on a date even. Now instead of some big huge thing that I get out of the way right away I'm letting that step come at a more natural time. And I'm not burdening someone else and making them my therapist. Because even tho it was a while ago and I'm way over that the story tends to bring up questions that are way too deep.

E

#773836 07/02/04 06:04 PM
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</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by justthewife:
<strong> I think the rules are empowering. You don't base your worth on what every date thinks of you, and you build your own self esteem. It also levels the playing field a bit - I don't feel like I'm at the mercy of some fellows whim.

And it's teaching a bit of restraint to me. I'm the type to lay my heart on the line, get attached, and trompled like an ant at an elephant party.

Not pretty! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />

One of my problems was telling the whole [censored] fell offa building story at the drop of a hat, sometimes before going out on a date even. E </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well, I am all for having a bit of restraint. I used to tell everyone I met about my evil abusive XH until I realized he and I met a lot of the same singles, and since he always spoke highly of me in public (at the same time he was speaking TO me in ways that would curl your hair), I did come off looking like a witch. If there's a rule that says "Never speak ill of your X on a date", I'm now all for it.

And I don't think women should base their esteem on what a date thinks of them either. I'm not opposed to some of the ideas behind the rules. The Wednesday call rule, for instance, has a sensible idea behind it-that you should have a social life of your own that does not revolve around having a date for every weekend. It's just that the rule makes it sound as if you should pretend you have things to do rather than actually having things to do. And that's my real problem with the rules I grew up with-the assumption underlying them was that in fact every woman is desperate for a man's love and attention, and rather than getting guidance in valuing ourselves, having our own interests, managing our own time, and truly requiring a man to earn our attention, we were taught how to fake being "hard to get". It's the fake part I don't like. I do like the part about realizing that you are just as valuable as he is, that you don't have to drop whatever you are doing when a man calls, that you can manage your own emotions and not wear your heart on your sleeve, and that it's a lot of fun to flirt.

And thanks for the kind words.

#773837 07/02/04 08:46 PM
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I don't think I'd have to worry too much about the Wednesday rule. As a mother of two, who works and also loves to play creative housewife, and has friends... I'm not sure I'd be free if a man called and asked a weekend in advance.

I'm like the chic restraunts. You have to book me months in advance.

Hmm. so why am I here??? Oh, yeah. I've just gotten done the lawn.

Hey do the rules cover exactly how much phyiscial contact is allowed on each date? Moral stuff aside, I was always hazy on that one, and as a 37 year old, it seems harder.

#773838 07/02/04 09:36 PM
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Yep, they cover everything.

Their advice is to keep it to no more than a casual kissing on the first 3 dates.

Rule #15 is a whole chapter devoted to this issue.

The first three dates he doesn't get inside your house/apt/condo/tent/RV/cardboard box even though he is picking you up there.

And you don't go to his place either!

You decide when/if you are ready, and if you are WUMTHS (waiting until marriage to have sex) you should let him know after a while.

#773839 07/03/04 11:01 AM
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Excellent, I'm going to go buy this book.

Okay, I'm practicing hard at my "no gossip," and not asking who you dated. I'm curious naturally, but it's none of my business. But I do need a pat on the back for not asking!

I can see how it could be odd. Suddenly, you're not really anonymous any more. And if post about your relationship, he's see!

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