Things have gotten so horrible I dont know where to begin.........<p>I am sorry to be so absentee but I have been so very busy.<p>H got new apartment in the ghetto and I reluctantly (very) allowed him to take our D there under the condition that ow would not be there. I found out today that she was. When my D told me abotu daddys "friend" but didnt know her name I called his ex wife and asked if the older D had said anything about the weekend. She says "oh yeah, his little girlfriend was there and she told older D that she had a H but she was going to dump him for (my H)." Isnt that a nice thing to tell a 7 yr old. The very first time he takes our D to his place he screws it up. This is just the start of all of things.....<p>This morning (i didnt know the ow thing yet) when he got here we got into yet another argument and long story short he pushed me down. I hit my abdominal area on something.....not real sure what. He snapped to and came running over freaking out and then he took me to the ER. I almost didnt go with him since on the way out he grabbed a back and was flinging stuff and cussing. I do not know who this person is. Went to ER and when we walked into the door he tells them I "fell". When the lady took me back for my vitals and to fill out paperwork I told her the truth and it is documented. They listened to the babys heartbeat (which is a girl is I didnt tell yall) and baby seemed fine. <p>On the way to the ER he was muttering under his breath things like "you shoulda just let me go", "i knew better than to stay" "I told myself I was going to just drop her off and go" "why couldnt you just let me go"....blah blah. LIke it was MY fault that he pushed me down right. On the way back it was a different story and I am not sure for whos benefit it was. On the way back he was bawling and telling me how sorry he was and that I didnt deserve any of this and what was wrong with him and what should he do.....etc. I said nothing. I cried. I cant believe what all has happened. I cant believe this is the man I married. My gosh I loved him so much and on some level still do.<p>I realize he crossed a line today. Realized he had already crossed one with my D and just didnt know it until later. I have some decisions to make now and they scare me. He says he is going to call tomorrow when his phone gets turned on. If ow isnt there then Ill talk to him........if she is there he can call later. But I am thinking that he can no longer be around me. He can see our D but only under supervision by someone else that we both trust. He can call our D and she can call him. But I have nothing to say to him at the moment. Before he left he said he was going to try some counseling program through his work. If he continues to do that then we can talk after a few months or talk with a counselor. If things go well then maybe he can meet me when I have my birthing classes and hopefully then he can be at the birth. I think this is more than fair considering he is lucky to not be in jail today. Dont yall? But depending on if he is Jekyll or Hyde tomorrow will depend on if he sees it as fair. Just pray God will soften his heart and give me wisdom and guidence.<p>Love to all of you.........<p>bw

Dearest BW!!!!<p>I am at a loss for words! Just know that I am praying for you and your two little girls!!! I wish I could be of more help! We all love you, and pray for your safety and continued health!<p>Love,<p>Tigger

Hi b_w,
Sometimes things can't get any worse. They just HAVE to get better. Keep the faith! My heartfelt prayers are with you always.

BrokenWings,<p>I am praying for you. Praying for God to give you the strength and clarity you need to make these difficult decisions. I pray that He will give you HIS peace as you go through this harrowing time and I pray that I wish I could find a way to get to you so I can help you once the baby gets here and help you out in general....*sigh*<p>I miss you and miss talking with you. You have not left my mind and know that I am praying for you and standing with you and if you need anything, you know where to holler...<p>Hugs and prayers....
Twiisty

Oh Dear Friend B_W!!!<p>I have missed you! <p>I have a vivid imagination and it was working OVERTIME with worry about you!<p>Add my prayers and well wishes to the growing list of support for you!<p>Keep us posted! We are all conserned for you!

BW,<p>I'm sorry things have gone down hill. You know what you have to do. You have to start taking some of the steps we discussed in email. When your H crosses that line you know it, right now his actions are deplorable. I'm keeping you and the babies in my thoughts and prayers. Keep me updated.<p>Tee<p>P.S. I would have sent his butt to jail. [img]images/icons/mad.gif" border="0[/img]

BW,<p>You are in my prayers.<p>Be strong for you and your girls. You know what the Harley's say about abuse. You H has violated the rule of Protection. He cannot protect your from his anger; it is now your responsibility to protect yourself.<p>Just as an aside, even in the middle of an argument it is always best to let someone leave who is losing control. I doubt that you did anything to prevent his leaving, but just in case you did, please don't EVER stand between an angry person and the door. The smart ones will leave before they hit.<p>Prayers and {{{{{{{{{bw & girls}}}}}}}} hugs,
MJ

Dearest BW,
I am so sorry you are having to deal with this during a time that you should be enjoying and celebrating. You know I only sign in to say my peace. I read about you all cuz you were here for me during the "strangest" and painful time in my life. NOW you may not like what I write, and you have to know that it is only for you and the safety of your precious daughters.
First, if you told the ER persons the truth, and they documented it. It has to.. by law be reported to the police. If this occurs, your H is Not going to be happy. Please make sure you are safe. He does sound like he has too much on his plate (what all those lies and secret lives can do to a person [img]images/icons/rolleyes.gif" border="0[/img] ).
Second, it is your responsiblity to keep your daughter safe. Make sure his visitation is supervised.
Broken, have you ever asked his Xwife if he was ever violent towards her? ..he may have been during their marriage, or maybe during their split. The fact that he apoligized, and said he would get counciling, as a health professional..you usually only hear this when it has been a repeated pattern (not a first time incident). Like he knew the right thing to say, so you would not take it any further. Usually if it is a first or a one time thing..you get the "I am sorry" and you know "I would never do anything like this". Your H needs anger management classes.<p>He is also not being honest with you (taking D to apt when OW is there). WHY would he sneak and lie?? just to curb a fight???...NO because he is self centered. Do you have a lawyer yet??, if so I would make sure he gets a copy of your ER report, and makes a plan for supervised visitation for you daughter...REMEMBER he will have visitaion with an infant before long. Do you trust him to care properly for a infant??? he does not even sound like he can care for himself properly.
I am sorry BW if I sound harsh. but pushing (hitting etc..)a pregnant woman..is very serious.
This can cause your placenta to separate from the wall of the uterus..this is called an abruption..this can result in fetal and/or maternal death. It can happen very fast, and there are different degrees. I have seen this and it is not something you forget (esp when it can be avoided, such as being abused).<p>PLEASE ,PLEASE take care of you..forget him (I know easier said than done). He just is not the man you married right now. He is not a safe person to be around in your condition.
You know another thing comes to mind, when I hear stories like this...BW does your H have a history of drug use??, if not..do you think he could be involved in something like that?? he and his OW behavior fit that bill...(her telling a 7 y/o that she left her H for her daddy???)That is bizarre behavior...and your H's behavior too - lying, abusive..etc.. It is just a thought.
I hope I did not upset you, I want you to keep safe..for you and your babies. Please, make sure you have a good support network around you. You know you have us here..but make sure your family can be there for you..(((huggs))) MC

BW,<p>Lifting your family up in prayer right now... With God all things are possible... even the hardest of hearts can be broken. <p>MyCross is right, you need to take precautions to make sure you are safe. <p>I can't imagine what you are going through, maybe somewhat I can, but even though there is a heavy weight on your shoulders, God will make the load lighter. Unfortunately, I know it isn't instant, wish it was, but it'll come, sooner than you think - it always does.<p>Keeping you in prayer,<p>Julia

Dear Brokenwings,<p>I'm so sorry we don't live close enough
to get together. Every night I include
a special prayer for you. I hope you gain
the strength you need to move on emotionally
from him. My Cross stated it clearly!
As hard as it is when you are right there
going through it...take the wisdom of everyone
here and try to prevent yourself and babies
from any further harm (mentally and physically).
I know how much you value marriage and your love
for your daughter(s). Sadly he is not ready to
be the husband you deserve. Lay down the LAW.
You are such a sweet person! love, fluke

Where are you, BW? We are worried about you and wondering how you are and what is going on. Please update us.<p>You are in my thoughts and prayers, BW...please take care.<p>Love<p>Catnip =^^=