Forgiveness Realization (Reasons for my hopefully permanent turnaround) - 01/14/00 01:17 AM
I want to share something with you in hopes of making it a permanent attitude in me.<P>I have a very dear friend. Her husband is also a dear friend. These two people are my only true friends. I love them both. I told her about my H's affair, and told very very few others. He knows also and has tried to be there for my H as much as my H allows others to be there for him.<P>This dear couple will probably be separated by this time next year. I can analyze their love busters and their unmet needs, but that is meaningless at this point. <P>I gave them His Needs Her Needs. He read it some, she tossed it aside as useless and not applicable. She scoffed it. She has made me very mad in the past year because she doesn't treat her dear H very well and I see so much love from him She has no romantic love for him anymore.<P>I am convinced she is being unfaithful to him, if not, then she is dangerously close.<P>I realized that I not only would forgive her, but had already forgiven her in a since. Let's not argue the issue of whether I would be in a position of forgiving here. The fact is she will always be my friend and I will accept her as a friend even if she was unfaithful to her H. I would open my home for her if she needed a place to stay. I would do what I could for her. I would also remain friends with him (he is like a brother).<P>Now, why would I be able to forgive her so easily, yet not forgive my H for his affair. SELFISHNESS!!!!!<P>She didn't do anything to me so I am objective and see the futility and pain of her loveless marriage.<P>How can I sit back and be so condemning of my h's Selfish Affair?<P>Just a thought, very humbling at that.<P>Jess<p>[This message has been edited by Essyboo (edited January 14, 2000).]