Need some advice from you all.... - 07/02/00 03:55 PM
As some of you know, I haven't been here in a while, sometimes i do lurk, but most of the time it is hard to remember the things we try so hard to forget.<BR>I have some questions here from you all as you are recovering. We have been in recovery for 3 months now. things have been going along okay for the most part. Actually some days it is really great, toher's not so great.<P>But here is my questions.. <P>We have been trying to rebuild our marriage...but... we are finding that we are so awkward with each other. If we are with other people OR with our children then we are okay. but when we are alone, I feel so awkward and he has said the same thing. Is this normal? To feel awkward with each other when alone. The intimacy part is back to normal, actually better than ever, but when it comes to converation and being alone, it is just sooo weird. Does this go away with time? I know we really try but since I had the affair, I feel emotionally disconnected with him when we are alone. I hate this feeling and have no idea how to solve this. I just wanted some input from some of you who have been in recovery and understand what I am talking about.<P>I am almost to the point where I want to avoid being alone with him. Not that he has done anything wrong, just that I do not know how to feel or act when we are alone. I know that I love him but, i seem to be having a hard time learning to meet some of the emotional needs such as conversation. <P>He is working long hours in his new job and insteadof letting me go to work, he took on more hours at his job and took on a part time job in the evenings. Now ofcourse I do not understand what the difference is that he now works 15 hours a day instead of letting me work a part time job during the day so we have time to gether. We need to figure this out or we are going to fail at this marriage. Does any of this make sense?<BR>does anyone hae any suggestion?<P>forgot something.. He seems to be having second thoughts about us. After our last disterous "date night" he was very hurt and said that "I lovED you so much THEN". I almost felt like he was saying that he wasn't sure about this anymore. <P>any suggestions? <P>HELP!!!<BR>mercy<P>[This message has been edited by mercy (edited July 02, 2000).]<P>