When does the pain lessen? - 11/28/11 04:14 PM
This time last year I figured out the password to dh's phone and discovered the email saying how great it was to talk 3 hours on the phone and I love you. This was not an email to me but to another woman. I had all 3 kids at church by myself. Dh had moved out for a week at the end of October but called and asked to move back in. From about mid October until the end of the year I can tell you almost exactly what happened every day and how I felt.
It has been a year now - Dec 9th will be one year of no contact. I thought it was November but found out in February through a mailing that it was Dec 9th - another lie:(
From what I can find out it is all out on the table now and I do believe it to be. We have moved from FL to TX. Left our home and family for a job out here and a fresh start. We met in TX and married here and started our family here so in someways that part is nice. Dh is constantly doing things to meet my needs and I love doing things for him. Lack of sex led to the affairs. I was sexually abused as a child and ended up with issues from it. I have since worked on my adversion and now enjoy sex - in fact I enjoy it so much dh is not sure he can keep up with me:) We have the marriage of my dreams now truly. I love being with him and he loves being with me. We talk through things, we enjoy making love - in fact I would say my great struggles on our my period not sure if it is just not having sex during that time or my hormones throwing me out of whack.
When does the thoughts and the hurt die down? There is rarely a morning I don't wake up with the thought of the fact that my husband told another woman that he loved her and he wanted to marry her. They planned on getting marrying. She had told him she had filed for divorce I found out that was a lie. He still admits to not hating her. This is him being truthful but it makes me cringe. How can we have a marriage if he still cares for her even if he does not speak with her again ever? I hate the pain she helped cause me. My chest actually hurts when I think about it. He says he doesn't love her and he realizes he never really did. He says he loves me with all his heart. Sometimes I don't want to be in a quiet place b/c I don't want the thoughts to enter my mind. I am sooooo thankful for the marriage I have not but does the hurt go away?
Tammy
It has been a year now - Dec 9th will be one year of no contact. I thought it was November but found out in February through a mailing that it was Dec 9th - another lie:(
From what I can find out it is all out on the table now and I do believe it to be. We have moved from FL to TX. Left our home and family for a job out here and a fresh start. We met in TX and married here and started our family here so in someways that part is nice. Dh is constantly doing things to meet my needs and I love doing things for him. Lack of sex led to the affairs. I was sexually abused as a child and ended up with issues from it. I have since worked on my adversion and now enjoy sex - in fact I enjoy it so much dh is not sure he can keep up with me:) We have the marriage of my dreams now truly. I love being with him and he loves being with me. We talk through things, we enjoy making love - in fact I would say my great struggles on our my period not sure if it is just not having sex during that time or my hormones throwing me out of whack.
When does the thoughts and the hurt die down? There is rarely a morning I don't wake up with the thought of the fact that my husband told another woman that he loved her and he wanted to marry her. They planned on getting marrying. She had told him she had filed for divorce I found out that was a lie. He still admits to not hating her. This is him being truthful but it makes me cringe. How can we have a marriage if he still cares for her even if he does not speak with her again ever? I hate the pain she helped cause me. My chest actually hurts when I think about it. He says he doesn't love her and he realizes he never really did. He says he loves me with all his heart. Sometimes I don't want to be in a quiet place b/c I don't want the thoughts to enter my mind. I am sooooo thankful for the marriage I have not but does the hurt go away?
Tammy