First Date Since Divorce...X Calls During Dinner!

Divorce was final a month ago. X has been gone for 8 months, moved out one month after meeting OM.A friend of mine has been trying to introduce me to a friend of his. Single mom, 32 years old, nurse, goes to his church, lives in our neighborhood, etc. I'm not crazy about the idea of meeting someone new, let alone dating, but I've played along with the idea.Tonight I finally met her. My friend invited me to dinner. A half hour before I got to the restaurant, he called and said "the girls will be here about seven..." I'd been set up! She's a nice lady, very pretty, a little shy. No sparks, but I'm sure I'll see her again.Anyway, about halfway through our appetizer, my cell phone starts vibrating furiously. It was the X! Turns out our D was 5 minutes late coming home, but judging by the call, I'd have thought it was a major emergency. In the middle of the message (yes, I didn't answer the initial call), X said "I don't want to interrupt your little DATE..."I excused myself and called her back. One of the first things she said was "I don't want to spoil you DATE, or anything..." What does she have, radar? I had told her I was meeting my friend for dinner, and I didn't know the girls would be there until later. Anyway, she spent a good 10 minutes complaining about D being irresponsible, her note from the teacher, etc. Basically complained about how tough it was to keep D on the straight and narrow and would I please watch her for a few days while she (X) calmed down. I ended the conversation promising to take care of D for the next couple of nights.What gets me is: How did she know what I was doing, and why was it such a big deal? Do I need to explain myself to her? I never mentioned the fact that this was an unexpected double date, but somehow she seemed to know what was going on, and for some reason she was not happy about it!I've already had the "we're divorced now, don't be surprised if I start dating someone" talk with her. I've told her she's free to run into the arms of OM or whomever she wants. She's already said "I hope your next girlfriend doesn't mind the dog sleeping on the bed," etc.So why is she getting so snotty about the fact I had a sort-of date? Do I need to be up front with her when I go out with someone? Isn't it a bit hypocritical for her to act this way when she's been seeing someone else for the last 9 months?

One Word...Jealosy

They are unpredictable....Hell my ex asked a friend a while ba..."Has Bill gotten laid yet?"....Her words, I kid you not...Go figure....... Bill

Sometimes you don't realize what you have, until you let them go!

Why should you need to tell her your plans? Isn't that what she gave up getting a D from you?Obviously she still has feelings for you or she wouldn't care. Sounds like you handled the situation very well though. I certainly don't know all the details but is dropping her D (whom I know you care for) in your lap for the rest of the weekend her insurance policy to keep you at home and away from other women?I am certainly no expert here but just a couple of thoughts. What a great weekend to take her D for a spin in the mustang!!! Enjoy!!!

I'm sure your friend has good intentions with setting you up, but I don't think he is doing this woman a favor. You clearly have not worked through the pain of your divorce or issues related to your children. Do yourself (and this woman you just met) a huge favor...get your act together and get your life on track before you invite anyone new into it.You have a daughter. She should be your first priority. I'm not sure I like the suggested notion by another poster that your ex is trying to spoil your social life by having you watch your D over the weekend. The last thing you need to be worrying about (regarding your D) is how it going to affect your "social life".

Hopeless: You're right about her still having feelings. I doubt that she's dropping D on me to keep me at home, though. She's genuinely struggling with D. D is having trouble adjusting to this new life. For 6 years she had a stable home, now she's sharing a 1 bedroom apt. with her messed-up mom. I'm more than happy to take care of her for as long as it takes.Interesting thought though...TheStudent: I'll have to agree with you on that one! I've actually got TWO friends who are trying to jump-start my social life! This one just wants me to meet a nice girl from his church, while the other one wants me to head out to the bars to find some "fun."Quite frankly I'm not into either scenario. Like I said earlier, I'll probably see this woman again, but we'll just be friends. That much I can tell for sure. There was no chemistry...none, zip, zero. As for D, she ALWAYS comes first. I've had a few women from work as "so, when do I get a ride in your convertible?" I have to say "sorry, there's only one girl that gets that priveledge...and she's 12!" She's the number one priority for me right now. I was kind of ambushed with this "date," but if it ever came down to my social life vs spending quality time with D, there'd be no question which one I'd choose.

Her D is so lucky to have you in her life. (am I right in thinking that I read in one of your posts that D is hers from a previous relationship?) Keep up the good work!

You're right, I did't meet her D until she was six...and I'm the lucky one!