I did the research, had the numbers and was sure of myself in making the deal.....YEA!

I picked a salesman I felt comfortable with, and he told me he just filed papers for a divorce last week after I had been there a bit. His wife was apperntly unhappy and didnt tell him for 6 years. I was tempted to ask about a third pary involvement, but didnt have the guts. He seemed pretty sad about it, they had tried counseling and now were trying to make the seperation work for the 2 kids. I felt bad for him becasue he kept saying, I could have changed, I could have done more, but she was so resentful now.

It made me sad too.... why cant people communicate better and be honast with the ones they love?

Yippee on the new car!!! What did you get? Doesn't it feel good to know that you are just fine on your own!!!

It is sad that we aren't as a whole better, nicer and more honest with the ones that we love.

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I know how you feel, when my husband left me in December I was stuck with either a Durango payment I couldn't afford on my own, or a car that was paid for but not reliable. I did the research and found a great car with a payment I could afford and got it on my own! It's a good feeling when you know you are not financially dependent on anyone, though I have to admit his leaving me has been the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with. Still have bad moments fairly often, but I have gone on with my life and know that no matter what happens between us in the future that I will be OK.

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Congratulations on your new car purchase!

I got A Toyota Matrix.... its kind of fun too.

Yea Lora!!!

Congrats on your new car..... ok girl question....what's the color? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

L.

Hi Lora, Drive it in good health!

Its Cosmic blue metalic. A light blue.

It feels good, I'll be happy to be rid of the memories with the old one.

And as Jo says, "we've been through hell, and we desearve it" <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Hope you all are doing OK. I'm coming up on trigger season, but I hope it wont be too bad this year. I'm planing a garden party, a weekend away, and some house cleaning...clensing out those bad vibes. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Big Congrats on a couple items, Lora!

1. You needed that new vehicle, and

2. You did it ALL ON YOUR OWN, and

3. You picked a great vehicle. Reliable, attractive, low maintenance, great gas mileage and good resale value (our husband's should have been so great LMAO!)

You did really good!

And hey All, here's a link to what Lora's new ride looks like, although her color is that cool blue.

Lora's Stellar NEW RIDE

Love,
Jo

Hi Lora, Congratulations on the new car! Yeah, I know how you felt about the salesman. Every time I run into someone with similar circumstances: affair, spouse left them, contemplating divorce, etc. it really triggers my codependent urges to give advice and try to help them solve their problem. Oops! couldn't solve mine so I'd better stay out of theirs...

When my H left he decided, out of guilt, that I needed a new car so we went and picked out a Chevy Tahoe (I need 4-wheel drive where I live and I had 6 teenagers living here so needed a big vehicle). This was just one of the many things he did that I took as a sign that he would eventually come home. Nope.

Six months later, when I filed for divorce and got a restraining order, I traded in the new car for another new one. I felt completely wasteful and extravagant, but the Tahoe already had unpleasant memories. I got myself a white Avalanche, since my H took the truck and I need one for the horses, etc. I love it, it's mine, no bad memories.

It's amazing how symbolic a new car can be.

Hey Jo,
Thanks for the tech support. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Letstry,
Yes everytime he came home we looked at new cars, and I would take it as a sign.......Grrr

But this one is all my own choice. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Cool]" src="images/icons/cool.gif" />

Lora,

I am so proud of you! I did the same a few years ago and you know what I'm so proud about...I came out of this mess with great credit, ex's is horrible.

My last car (the Durango you had when I was here) had OW written all over it. She had been in it many times with him so, I stuck them with it. The lease was in his name, so I went and bought myself a new car and dumped the Durango on them...he had to pay it until the lease was up. Hell hath no fury....well you know.

BTW, they are getting married in October. I'm ok with it, I'll just have to keep myself busy that weekend...my kids are in the wedding.

Things are pretty good here. I just put my house on the market, so that will be a huge milestone for us. Talk about scary, buying a house myself scares the crap out of me.

Sounds like you were very sweet to the car salesman...do you think he was screwing around? If not, keep his card and call him in about a year, you never know.

I miss you guys...we obviously don't feel the need to come to MB a lot anymore, which is good, but I will never ever forget that the people on this board, especially you and Jo were there for me much much more than my lifelong friends, and even my family. I don't think I could have survived it without you two and this board. I'd love to see you both again someday.

Love to you Lora, and to Jo.

allison

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">az alison wrote:
<strong>Sounds like you were very sweet to the car salesman...do you think he was screwing around? If not, keep his card and call him in about a year, you never know.
</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Nah. Some in my family were in the car biz. They work too many hours. You'd never see him. For example, if they close at 8, but at 8:45, there's still one guy walking around opening and closing car doors, the salesman sez "Take your time." Meanwhile, the finance man is sitting in his office, on the phone with his w, saying "there's just one customer left, but I've got to stay in case he buys." Now you know why they're such a pain to haggle with. They want revenge for all those hours waiting. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

-AD

<small>[ July 22, 2003, 04:22 PM: Message edited by: AD. ]</small>

Ya , I had the feeling it was a walk away wife kind of thing.... proabaly due to the long hours and not paying her enough attention. But he just seems so genuinly shocked and surprized. I'm sure he thought he was working hard for his family. Its just so complicated sometimes isnt it? I think he is a little young tho <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Allison, come to Washington that weekend!!! We will take your mind off it. Would love to show you around. Really.

Congrats!!! Last month I bought a new carriage myself. Did my own haggling. And paid cash for it. Got them down nearly 20%.

Yahoo!!!!

There are some wonderful moments in life.