Ready for 04...Who's with me? - 01/11/04 05:47 PM
Spent last month or so just going through holidays and did pretty darn good. It is great to see oldtimers like Dana B back...Congratulations..I hope to be in your shoes soon one day. And Cinderella, I couldn't get thru to your email address...said a fatal error when I tried to email you.
So? What's goin on? Job is going wonderful. I actually have gotten out a tiny bit and it's going well. Had a few days of feeling blue when son went with Jethro to Disneyworld along with OW and her son...The family image they are fraudulantly shoving at the world sickened me plus Disneyworld was where we went on honeymoon...She's the second OW he's taken to that place so it's kinda like rubbing salt into a healing, yet tender wound..But I am getting out of valleys so much faster now. Went to a new years' ball with some of my friends and we had a blast! Wore awesome dress and a few min. after midnight, this guy jumped in front of me and said "hey, why aren't you here with somebody? If you'd like, I'd love to dance with you and get you a glass of champagne." I said I was with my friends and that I'd dance. So I did. I danced. Maybe three songs with him but I wasn't interested. But that was huge and rather symbolic for me. Less than five minutes after new year, the first year I have truly been single, I get an offer to dance. One of my favorite songs is "I Hope You Dance" and I guess I finally did what the song said to do. Took long enough that's for sure. And next friday night am going out to very popular place with same group of friends (six of us..four girls and two guys). So I am attempting when son is visiting Jethro to start getting some sort of a social life now. But the big thing I can tell is that the guard is up really really high for me. Like rapunzel in a tower...A really high tower that she won't let any guy anywhere near unless she decides to let her hair down. Oh well, there's time.
Got asked out by a really cute P.A. with one of the practices I work with. I told him that I would love to be friends now and that I am in this new phase, a good one, and might do that but after being friends a while. So that's neat. But I am not looking for anything and am just happy that I am moving on. As for x? He's still destructive..Lied to OW and gave me his version of a Christmas "present" of 500. She has no clue. I feel kinda bad for her actually now. She's fixing to drop the baby in march and she has only a small idea of what is in store for her and her days of wine and roses are numbered. And x has gone off and shown his financial status...He has purchased within the month (is it any coincidence that it all happened within a week or two of judge signing papers?) a new convertible mercedes and a new navigator? Ironically the navigator is for OW..And can you guess what it is that I drive? A navigator. My second one I've had. So he has placed OW into same vehicle that I am driving, albeit newer. Isn't that the hilarious analogy? Like the car one? Same model, just a few years younger..Except she's nothing like me. But I emailed attorneys this week and informed them of his buying sprees and asked if they could now get a more accurate view of his financial picture as the decree stated clearly, as we had written itno it, that if he is in any way untruthful about his finances we can get what we need. I may have to wait a mo. or two, but that might be in order.
I hate to be that way, but my son deserves better. We struggle still, and my lease is due in a few mos. so I will no longer drive the suv..I keep modifying my lifestyle and x keeps getting richer. Sure it makes me mad, but it is not something I really focus on too much. I only think of it now and then and wanted to update here on what's happened.
Oh, this is hilarious...My aunt sent me a book "How to find a Husband after 35" using principles the author learned at harvard business school. I am finally reading it.
Somebody here has a question about how to meet men after a divorce. I think this book is good for both women and men. Gives good ideas. It is not a read for those who want hearts and flowers and stuff like that. It's tough and when you're ready to forge ahead and want remarriage or marriage in the first place, it's good. I am not there yet, but am reading and checking out the principles. Guerilla approach to dating.
And according to the book, I am way too much of a homebody. I have to get out three to four nights a week. This would be a fun thread. To see who does the book's principles and what success we have with it.
Just a thought for all of us who want to really move ahead and get on with life as we know it.
I see a few new people and would like to say sorry you're here on divorced, but you are among friends. We will listen when you want to rant or cry. We'll try to give advice to your questions or sitch. And we will try to lift you up if we can.
One thing I learned is that you cannot control the actions of the WS. They will do in the end what it is they want to do. Sure, it's fog, but it's their will. We have our will. We are only able to control us. Not them. And that's important to note. You can try all different things, but they must begin with you. I've also been reading alot of plan A and B for future needs..Hopefully not a need for plan B though. There's a bit too much emphasis on A of the BS working on them. The real nature of A is to work on BS, but also to sever the ties of affair. That means also exposing the affair and doing other uncomfortable things all the while trying to get WS to recommit to marriage. Just something to think about. I guess that I didn't do enough of that part of plan A and if I can help anybody out in that area, I hope I did.
But life's still a bit of a struggle, but I am struggling and putting a smile on my face and one foot ahead of the other one each day...and hitting the good sales to look cute on that journey ahead! You can do it.
So? What's goin on? Job is going wonderful. I actually have gotten out a tiny bit and it's going well. Had a few days of feeling blue when son went with Jethro to Disneyworld along with OW and her son...The family image they are fraudulantly shoving at the world sickened me plus Disneyworld was where we went on honeymoon...She's the second OW he's taken to that place so it's kinda like rubbing salt into a healing, yet tender wound..But I am getting out of valleys so much faster now. Went to a new years' ball with some of my friends and we had a blast! Wore awesome dress and a few min. after midnight, this guy jumped in front of me and said "hey, why aren't you here with somebody? If you'd like, I'd love to dance with you and get you a glass of champagne." I said I was with my friends and that I'd dance. So I did. I danced. Maybe three songs with him but I wasn't interested. But that was huge and rather symbolic for me. Less than five minutes after new year, the first year I have truly been single, I get an offer to dance. One of my favorite songs is "I Hope You Dance" and I guess I finally did what the song said to do. Took long enough that's for sure. And next friday night am going out to very popular place with same group of friends (six of us..four girls and two guys). So I am attempting when son is visiting Jethro to start getting some sort of a social life now. But the big thing I can tell is that the guard is up really really high for me. Like rapunzel in a tower...A really high tower that she won't let any guy anywhere near unless she decides to let her hair down. Oh well, there's time.
Got asked out by a really cute P.A. with one of the practices I work with. I told him that I would love to be friends now and that I am in this new phase, a good one, and might do that but after being friends a while. So that's neat. But I am not looking for anything and am just happy that I am moving on. As for x? He's still destructive..Lied to OW and gave me his version of a Christmas "present" of 500. She has no clue. I feel kinda bad for her actually now. She's fixing to drop the baby in march and she has only a small idea of what is in store for her and her days of wine and roses are numbered. And x has gone off and shown his financial status...He has purchased within the month (is it any coincidence that it all happened within a week or two of judge signing papers?) a new convertible mercedes and a new navigator? Ironically the navigator is for OW..And can you guess what it is that I drive? A navigator. My second one I've had. So he has placed OW into same vehicle that I am driving, albeit newer. Isn't that the hilarious analogy? Like the car one? Same model, just a few years younger..Except she's nothing like me. But I emailed attorneys this week and informed them of his buying sprees and asked if they could now get a more accurate view of his financial picture as the decree stated clearly, as we had written itno it, that if he is in any way untruthful about his finances we can get what we need. I may have to wait a mo. or two, but that might be in order.
I hate to be that way, but my son deserves better. We struggle still, and my lease is due in a few mos. so I will no longer drive the suv..I keep modifying my lifestyle and x keeps getting richer. Sure it makes me mad, but it is not something I really focus on too much. I only think of it now and then and wanted to update here on what's happened.
Oh, this is hilarious...My aunt sent me a book "How to find a Husband after 35" using principles the author learned at harvard business school. I am finally reading it.
Somebody here has a question about how to meet men after a divorce. I think this book is good for both women and men. Gives good ideas. It is not a read for those who want hearts and flowers and stuff like that. It's tough and when you're ready to forge ahead and want remarriage or marriage in the first place, it's good. I am not there yet, but am reading and checking out the principles. Guerilla approach to dating.
And according to the book, I am way too much of a homebody. I have to get out three to four nights a week. This would be a fun thread. To see who does the book's principles and what success we have with it.
Just a thought for all of us who want to really move ahead and get on with life as we know it.
I see a few new people and would like to say sorry you're here on divorced, but you are among friends. We will listen when you want to rant or cry. We'll try to give advice to your questions or sitch. And we will try to lift you up if we can.
One thing I learned is that you cannot control the actions of the WS. They will do in the end what it is they want to do. Sure, it's fog, but it's their will. We have our will. We are only able to control us. Not them. And that's important to note. You can try all different things, but they must begin with you. I've also been reading alot of plan A and B for future needs..Hopefully not a need for plan B though. There's a bit too much emphasis on A of the BS working on them. The real nature of A is to work on BS, but also to sever the ties of affair. That means also exposing the affair and doing other uncomfortable things all the while trying to get WS to recommit to marriage. Just something to think about. I guess that I didn't do enough of that part of plan A and if I can help anybody out in that area, I hope I did.
But life's still a bit of a struggle, but I am struggling and putting a smile on my face and one foot ahead of the other one each day...and hitting the good sales to look cute on that journey ahead! You can do it.