I need help. I am the father of 3 step-kids and 2 boys with my WS. We have been married 15 years. I am her 2nd husband and met her while she was separated from her 1st husband. About 7 years ago, my WS traveled to AZ to attend a funeral of her daughters grandmother. I thought it was unusual that she did not take our daughter to the funeral. When she returned, i could feel she had been unfaithful but she lied to me for almost a year before I caught her sending nude photos to another man. She confessed that she had been with an old flame from HS and had slept with him. I was devestated but told her I would forgive her if she promised it was over and she would never contact him again. Over the next year, I caught her chatting with men on Craigslist and found new nude photos on her phone. I withdrew and could not perform with her due to images of what she was doing with the men she was seeing. We grew apart and all intimacy between us ceased. In 2011 I discovered her profile on Ashley Madison and confronted her. She told me that she would delete her profile but secretively opened a new one. Earlier this year I discovered she is seeing a man who works for the Dept of Homeland Security Criminal Alien Taskforce. I confronted her and she left me and the kids. I dearly love my wife and want her back but I cannot endure her constant cheating. We have filed bankruptcy to save our home but now I have been left to deal with an emotional and financial nightmare. Someone, please help me find the correct path to take. Im at a total loss as to what to do and am an emotional wreck

Hey Vince. This really isn't an active thread for posting new threads. You'll need to go to the "Surviving an Affair" forum and start your own thread there.

My personal opinion of anyone who comes here saying their wife has been posting on and meeting men on Ashley Madison and/or craigslist is that she is mentally ill. Only a mentally ill woman would arrange secret meetings for sex with complete or near strangers. Most are likely "Bi-Polar" and in a mania where the risk taking hyper sexualize entitled behavior drives the behavior. Your bankruptcy is consistent with my guess too. I'm not a doctor but sane women don't troll for sex on craigslist and ashleymadison.com.

You can recover with a bipolar but it's really hard. NEAR impossible and probably not healthy FOR YOU. To do so you need a firm boundary of they must take their meds and follow up with a trusted doctor, she must have little to no contact with men, any phone or computer she uses must be keylogged and monitored to protect her AND she must give you full power of attorney to handle all financial and medical affairs. Problem is their illness makes them VERY resistant to such "care".

Most likely, you need to divorce and protect your children from her and her destructive behavior. She has abandoned not only you...but her children. Document this and protect them legally. Bi-polar happens in cycles so it's possible she'll return home when the mania subsides. If you don't set up those firm boundaries BEFORE you let her back in...she'll just do this again to you and the children.

Vince66, you have your own thread now. Please post here for advice.

I have taken the advice I found here and exposed the affair on Facebook. I posed as a female on Ashley Madison and got the OM to send me his compromising photos. I then posted them on the Dept of Homeland Security Facebook page with the OM's name and the office he heads. I stated he is having an elicit affair with my wife of 15 years and that I would hope his superiors would reprimand him for his unethical behavior. She went ballistic! She raided my bank account and took every cent. She also snatched the kids and told me I would never see them again. She has threatened to shut off my cellphone and take my vehicle, which is in her name. I know this is to be expected. I have established a new checking account to ensure my direct deposited paycheck will not be absconded again. I am looking for a divorce attorney to get further advice and to inquire about a suit for alienation of affection and criminal conversation both of which are illegal in my state. My question is what do I do next?

Was this your only exposure? Did you expose to your families, friends, and the OM's spouse and family members?

You didn't take the advice you found here, if that is the way you exposed this man to his line of command. The advice here is to report them directly - not to post on the employer's FB page. Also, we generally advise exposure directly to the employers if the affair is a workplace affair. Is this a workplace affair?

By posting those details there, did you also post your wife's name (or other identifying information) for the world to see?

Have you had any response from the employers?