sean hannity show is discussing a study which reveal that men who have hot wives have happy marriages

this study involved 450 couples and completely validates Dr Harleys advice in the book his needs her needs

I Googled this and found this article from a woman's perspective:

TMF Article

I found it amusing, especially this part:

JK,

One thing about having a hot wife however is that it can drive a man crazy. The hot wives just get hit on so much, is it normal that in a church some guy my W never saw before comes up to us starts talking to my W making gestures near his crotch?

At one time I just accepted this as the price paid for having a much hotter wife then I should ever have had. Perhaps that's why I didn't leave her years ago because of OM2.

God Bless
Gamma

I can say for sure that having a less attractive wife has lead many morally absent dudes to seek other out guys' far superior looking wives.

[video:youtube]Qh9ZZgDqzAg[/video]

Made me think of this song, "If you want to be happy for the rest of your life, make an ugly woman your wife" Always made sense to me

This song was discussed on the radio show; Sean Hannity had never heard of it!

But the song is not true....and thats why Physical Attraction is listed as a top need in His Needs Her Needs

Attraction is in the eye of the beholder. What one man thinks is hot another may not ... what woman thinks is beautiful on her may be repulsive to a man.

Dr. Harley states having a spouse that is beautiful in your eyes can only make a marriage to a certain point because other needs will need to be met after while. Granted PA is what hooks the two together and makes initial lovebank deposits, but it is the other EN's that build the relationship.

Just having "Hotness" isn't going to make a relationship last in the long term.

I find men hot (they meet my need for PA) ... it is usually what gets me interested ... but their bad habits, inability to meet my needs (IC, RC, and affection) drain me quick.

Hence I realize there is zero chance of making the relationship work (unless he is willing to fundamentally change who he is).

PA complements the relationship ... it doesn't make it. I am woman and I would be very upset if I was with someone who only enjoyed my looks ... I am much more than looks, and I want my other needs met as well.

Something to remember is PA can drain a man's lovebank as well. A man marries a woman expecting this need to be met, and I believe a woman should do her part to meet that need because it does drain the lovebank. I can see why men would be happier in the marriage if this need is always met for them.

But keep in mind some things are out of our control and needs cannot always be met ... this is why boundaries play a vital part. If a woman stops meeting this need for a while a man should know how to protect himself.

I tried to make this observation somewhere else but I think my meaning got lost. So I'll try again. I find it somewhat ironic that what most people base their initial interest in another person on, is often not even something in their top 5 emotional needs.


I fixed this part for you.

FTF ... you keep me in line... Thank you!

Yes ... he would want to change his bad habits into good marriage building habits. That is a challenge for most but I am an eternal optimist, and have faith it will some day happen!

PA is one of the ways to have instant chemistry because it is simply visual. As humans it is often overlooked that love is a combination of senses.

Recreation = sense of motion
IC = sense of hearing/speaking
Affection = sense of touch
PA = sense of visual
SF = sense of bonding

As humans it makes sense why these are the strongest needs because they connect us with another human.

PA isn't a strong need, but I use it as the first need. PA is one of my needs that can drain my lovebank over time if my spouse becomes something I no longer find attractive. For others their sense of touch may be their first need or maybe it's IC that is their first need. I think each person differs. Many men visual is by far the strongest ... that resonates to PA only.

My wife is hot.. Does that count?

I don't think that men should worry about an attractive wife being a man-magnet. It's pretty easy to give off deep-freeze, don't-approach me signals and this is a skill every woman should have. I know lots of beautiful married women who are very seldom hit on now, but had lots of attention when single.

Hmm. Thinking about starting a rich husband discussion...

That would be interesting!

Oh man catwhit don't get me started, too often a big salary comes with big hits to the UA time, I don't think it's worth it. What's the point of having time off if you don't get to take it?

Do you think that a husband who doesn't seem to get jealous secretly thinks his wife is not attractive?

That's possible but I would think more likely he's not getting jealous because his wife isn't sending out "vibes."

RQ ... freeloaders don't get jealous. They simply dump what they have and move onto the next thing that will temporarily meet their needs.

If a wife has poor boundaries and her husband is in love with her jealousy is life's way of saying there is a threat. Jealosy should be present when proper care for the love they share is threatened by the surroundings.

Or your boundaries are so tight that he doesn't feel a threat to his marriage.

Well, that makes me feel better

A little bit of jealousy when make me feel even better

Dr. Harley says he doesn't get jealous, whereas Joyce does.

Maybe, RQ, you would like a little more ATTENTION from kiss? How about PDA's?

Also, though, Dr. Harley says that jealousy is often a part of someone's personality. He says that even though Joyce is very attractive, he just never was jealous. It's not a part of who he is as a person. On the other hand, even with all the EPs, Joyce is jealous of Dr. Harley. She will tell him if something bothers her regarding OS interaction, and he just fixes it.

IOW the answer would depend partly on whether the person has ever been jealous before. If so, and they are not in the current relationship, then that could be a sign of a lack of romantic love.

My wife is smoking hot. I've only gotten jealous once in our 14 years together. And I can't remember really getting jealous with my ex wife or any ex girlfriends. I'm just notaa jealous person.

I've never been jealous before the relationship I am currently in. I've always thought I was not a remotely jealous person and that was a handicap which made me blind to the A.

However I get jealous for silly reasons now. Like Joyce, I feel like covering up my boyfriend's eyes when there's nudity in a film! I don't know why now, maybe I feel more allowed to be jealous since finding MB or maybe my lovebank balance is higher. What has surprised me about jealousy is that it isn't at all unpleasant. It's just a reflex and when it's low level the other person takes it as a compliment or finds it funny.