loss of respect - 08/01/98 02:31 AM
it has been seven months and we have followed all the advice on recovering - it has helped tremendously but I have trouble with the respect issue - trust is well covered in the material but what about respect - are we not allowed to make mistakes even if they are based on "bad judgement" - this seems to be the last hurdle for us - my spouse knows he erred and is truly sorry - we have yet to find out what was missing emotionally -have both taken the questionnaires and have come up with nothing other than I am guilty of "trusting too much" - it was very short lived - less than a month and only one sexual encounter but still it hurts. I have been able to get over this for the most part but I seem to have a very hard time not categorizing him as "just like most men" etc.....any help - I guess this would fall under the topic of "resentment" which I don't believe I am harbouring - I feel that I must have done something to contribute to this and he feels very guilty that I would feel this way - he says he never stopped loving me and it was a situation that "got out of hand" - still he jeopardized our family, our love, our friendship. What was wrong that would enable him to do this. I believe if I knew what allowed this to happen I would be able to deal with it better.