1 year, 3 months and 1 huge broken heart - 06/13/10 08:26 PM
Just letting everyone know that it's over with R. I ended it a couple of weeks ago because I mainly knew that he was not over his divorce and that he was not 100% in the relationship any more. I could see how bitter he was even though it's been over 4 years now and how he was getting more bitter than less as time went by. I could see him being so obsessed with being this super dad. It seemed like we rarely got our own time because he was running them places even when it was her day to have them, but I always thought it wasn't as much about the kids as it was about him proving something to her...So...
He text me last weekend that I was basically running no matter how I spin it. And today he emailed me this pretty much confirming what I knew already:
A-
These situations always force me into a mode of introspection and reflection. I've spent the last few weeks asking myself many questions.
No matter my actions and efforts the first few months of our relationship, it all changed in August when XW told me she was still seeing OM and intended to make him apart of the kids lives.
Basically, I've been more focused on trying to be a bigger, better, more dependable parent than I have a boyfriend. It doesn't mean that I stopped loving you. For me, the rules changed in the middle of the game. I have this deep desire to beat her at parenthood, to prove her wrong in her subtle attempts to show the kids that I'm inadequate as a father.
By my focus moving there, many of my early efforts stopped and long term dreams became overshadowed.
That's it...in a nushell. I'm sorry if I hurt you.
I do wish the very best for you.
R
I did write him back, The short of it is that I hope he gets past his bitterness and that this is not healthy for him or his kids, which we have talked about before.
My heart is breaking but I know it will heal. I never believed in soul mates until he came along and then I was really just starting to change my mind. :-(
Anna :-(
He text me last weekend that I was basically running no matter how I spin it. And today he emailed me this pretty much confirming what I knew already:
A-
These situations always force me into a mode of introspection and reflection. I've spent the last few weeks asking myself many questions.
No matter my actions and efforts the first few months of our relationship, it all changed in August when XW told me she was still seeing OM and intended to make him apart of the kids lives.
Basically, I've been more focused on trying to be a bigger, better, more dependable parent than I have a boyfriend. It doesn't mean that I stopped loving you. For me, the rules changed in the middle of the game. I have this deep desire to beat her at parenthood, to prove her wrong in her subtle attempts to show the kids that I'm inadequate as a father.
By my focus moving there, many of my early efforts stopped and long term dreams became overshadowed.
That's it...in a nushell. I'm sorry if I hurt you.
I do wish the very best for you.
R
I did write him back, The short of it is that I hope he gets past his bitterness and that this is not healthy for him or his kids, which we have talked about before.
My heart is breaking but I know it will heal. I never believed in soul mates until he came along and then I was really just starting to change my mind. :-(
Anna :-(