Dating someone with EN Honesty and Openness - 01/30/20 01:45 PM
How to fill an emotional need as number 1 such as Honesty and Openness when his trust is breached?
His feedback is it will take sometime to trust again and he will ask multiple questions and I need to give him space to do that. My solution that I have been fine with that (in my opinion he has always been that way since we have dated) answering his questions and the cause of him that got him upset I will fix.
We have been dating 4 months. I had learned my emotional needs and communicated them and learned what are his.
In the beginning I have told him I would like to keep finances separate if there would be marriage we would split covering expenses and share an account. It was a piece that I wasn’t open in discussing because I wanted to deal with it on my own it’s from my last relationship. I was in the room which I knew he could possibly hear and I was discussing about the debt situation. I got off the phone and went out o see him. He said when we’re you going to tell me? I told him I planned tonight. His point that when he had asked me a question that I had opportunities to tell him and I have not given him all the information. If he were to think of today to marry his mind isn’t there, we can’t get married he said till it’s done.
He wants to spend time with each other as much as we can. That’s great! It’s an emotional need for me. I am healing from that I have a partner that I upset and he thinks of me as a liar. (It wasn’t my intentions of hiding it, only recently that I said I’m feeling comfortable to talk about finances) His affection reduced and last request from me of his interruption and his tone to be gentle when I am answering, I don’t have a problem of him asking questions. His response was that it’s a two way street.
I have 4 kids and my thought process is that I would like to not talk about anything to do with finances, kids, or marriage or anything in the future. Till I get the finances all straighten out. I would want us to have fun and enjoy each other. I wouldn’t want to have him around the kids either until we know that we are solid and feel safe to avoid them being attached and if he decides I don’t fill his needs.
He fill my needs but there is withdrawal of love units. He is a caring man and priorities are of us. He repeats that he wants to work it out and he wants to be with me. He communicated that he feels I am pulling away from him and he shared his perspective that full custody up ahead he would like to spend time with each other in the evenings.
Am I exaggerating of my solution of where I am?
His feedback is it will take sometime to trust again and he will ask multiple questions and I need to give him space to do that. My solution that I have been fine with that (in my opinion he has always been that way since we have dated) answering his questions and the cause of him that got him upset I will fix.
We have been dating 4 months. I had learned my emotional needs and communicated them and learned what are his.
In the beginning I have told him I would like to keep finances separate if there would be marriage we would split covering expenses and share an account. It was a piece that I wasn’t open in discussing because I wanted to deal with it on my own it’s from my last relationship. I was in the room which I knew he could possibly hear and I was discussing about the debt situation. I got off the phone and went out o see him. He said when we’re you going to tell me? I told him I planned tonight. His point that when he had asked me a question that I had opportunities to tell him and I have not given him all the information. If he were to think of today to marry his mind isn’t there, we can’t get married he said till it’s done.
He wants to spend time with each other as much as we can. That’s great! It’s an emotional need for me. I am healing from that I have a partner that I upset and he thinks of me as a liar. (It wasn’t my intentions of hiding it, only recently that I said I’m feeling comfortable to talk about finances) His affection reduced and last request from me of his interruption and his tone to be gentle when I am answering, I don’t have a problem of him asking questions. His response was that it’s a two way street.
I have 4 kids and my thought process is that I would like to not talk about anything to do with finances, kids, or marriage or anything in the future. Till I get the finances all straighten out. I would want us to have fun and enjoy each other. I wouldn’t want to have him around the kids either until we know that we are solid and feel safe to avoid them being attached and if he decides I don’t fill his needs.
He fill my needs but there is withdrawal of love units. He is a caring man and priorities are of us. He repeats that he wants to work it out and he wants to be with me. He communicated that he feels I am pulling away from him and he shared his perspective that full custody up ahead he would like to spend time with each other in the evenings.
Am I exaggerating of my solution of where I am?