Phone and account is in my name.

What I know:

WW and AP started out with e-mails in July of '15. E-mails continued until December of '15, when they (at his behest) switched to "Words with Friends," where they could chat more securely with less of a trail (I saw many of the e-mails). Sometime in spring of '16, they switched to Palringo, a gaming/chat site to go even more underground and have the capability of sharing pics.

Our D-day was 9/11/16. Supposedly, A was terminated that day. NC put in play that day as well. I have no evidence that NC has been violated since.

Question 1: is there any way to look back on this phone to see what what was written/shared via the Words with Friends game (app) or Palringo? WW still plays Words with Friends, obviously not with AP anymore (that I know of, anyway), but she stopped using Palringo back in August or September, perhaps as late as D-day. I believe I could get into her account at Palringo, but probably only with her knowledge, as I don't know her username or password for that app.

Question 2: this phone is still being used today. Is there is an easy way for me to keep tabs on what is being done with it now?

I am not much of a tech savvy person, so keeping it simple would be helpful.

Thank you for your help.

Is anyone able to point me in the right direction or give me help?

Welcome to MB, 1987, and I'm sorry you haven't had any replies yet.

It may be that nobody who posting at the moment knows the answer to your technical questions; I don't, I'm afraid.

However, I think there is more to your issue than the technical aspects, important as these are. I think you should start a new thread in the forum Surviving an Affair. You can copy and paste your first post, and people will ask more questions from there. You will certainly get help if you post there.

Surely it's possible to put spyware on this phone. Isn't there information about different types of spyware for different type of phones, here in this section of the forum? Have you looked at the many threads here?

teensafe works well if you have the apple password AND access to the apple email account to delete the alert that (may) follow when logging into apple.

After my H affair, he got a new email so that she could not have a way to contact, but I kept his old email...so I am the only one that would see any alerts. For the record, there never has been an alert, but they do still warn you when pulling the info.

teensafe even works to see deleted emails. And websites, social media, etc.

Yes, I have checked out a number of threads on this subject.

I guess what I am looking for is a way to track/monitor the following things, in order of most importance:

1. A way to see what she is writing with her phone. Since she messaged the AP in various apps, it's not enough to monitor texting, because AFAIK, she didn't "text" him at all. It was all through chat features in those apps. If I had some type of keylogger that captured everything she "typed" with her phone, then it wouldn't matter if she was messaging inside an app.

2. A way to track web usage on her phone and see what pages she's searched for or visited.

3. A way to see all pictures taken with the phone and all pictures sent or received with it.

4. I would really like to see the pics she took during the affair. I don't know if there's a way to recover those deleted photos. I suspect there is a way, but it's above my pay grade and technical ability.

I know quite a bit about iPhones, and quite a bit about Marriage Builders, too. From what I read of your situation, I don't think your efforts are well served by obsessing on the phone. There are much more immediate issues to deal with.

When recovering from an affair, it is critical that the conditions that allowed the affair to happen are identified and mitigated. Both the betrayed spouse and the wayward spouse have to cooperate in this effort for a recovery to be successful.

So, what were the conditions that allowed this affair to happen? You have isolated her iPhone as a major facilitator. What needs to be done to eliminate this risk? I don't think her continuing the same destructive smartphone habits while you attempt to monitor is effectively addressing the risk. Do you? At the stage you are at, your wayward wife should be in agreement on recovery and be an active player in eliminating all risks.

Here is what you need to do: You need to get your wife to give you all relevant accesses and passwords to any accounts she holds. At a bare minimum, all social media apps should be removed from her phone, or better yet, she should give up the smartphone altogether. Radical you say? Sir, you are on the threshold of losing your marriage and wrecking the future for both you and your wayward wife. This isn't something to tiptoe around. You need to face it head on.

Now, the technical question - yes, most iPhones are set to store backups on iCloud, and it is possible to recover that which is stored. It depends on precisely what was backed up. But I don't recommend wasting time on this. You should focus on the present and leave the mistakes of the past behind. Get your wayward wife onboard with those effective extraordinary precautions that will give you confidence that nothing like this can ever happen again.

Thank you, sir, for the reply. I believe there is wisdom in what you wrote.

I also believe that it's important for me to have some method to assure me that my wife is remaining faithful in the aftermath of her affair, so that's why I think it's important to have some sort of monitoring capability for her phone.

As far as the stuff in the past like the pictures, I guess I could let that go.

If you go into the Settings, under Privacy:Location Services:System Services:Frequent Locations, you can see all of the places the phone has been routinely taken to and when. If you go online to www.icloud.com to the iCloud account attached to the phone, you can see has been put on iCloud by the phone.

Does anyone here have any suggestions for a good, stealthy key logger? I'd like to monitor everything that is typed via the phone (texts, private messages, e-mails, etc.).

Have you looked into webwatcher?

No, I haven't heard about that one. I will look into it.

Anybody heard of SpyEra? A write up about it sounded promising.

OK, I signed up for webwatcher. Unfortunately, so far I've requested data three times in three days, and always get "phone has not backed up to iCloud during the period requested, no data to report."

I know the phone's automatic iCloud backup is turned on, so I don't understand why this is happening.

You need to contact Webwatcher and ask them about this.

Check your available storage on iCloud. You only get 1GB for free, and once it fills up, the phone stops backing up. You can either delete stuff off iCloud to free up space, or you can buy more space for nominal cost.