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I lied alot . to not have problems or arguements ..
She tells me that I never put her first when I always though I did . she has very low image of herself . she is jelous of my kids my ex and the life we had prior to her and I
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there was under lying issues What issues?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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I lied alot . to not have problems or arguements ..
She tells me that I never put her first when I always though I did . she has very low image of herself . she is jelous of my kids my ex and the life we had prior to her and I Were you married when you met her? What about her? How did your relationship begin?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Empire either one of you have addiction problems?
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I wanna move home but I feel we are not ready yet ..This is a text she sent me 30 mins ago ...I lied I misled you I hurt you I was completely wrong I acted like a whore Yes I was selfish and for what ever its worthIm sorry I walk around with the guilt and the hurt and feelings of being a no good whore and a dirty slut everyday Imnot making excuses I made the decisionto do what I did You dont have to remind me I already know......See I understand shes in pain but I know I cant control my comments when my mind keeps having images and questions
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We both were already divorced . She was a childhood friend of my cousin and I friended her on MYspace and started talking to her then . We both dont have addiction problems .
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I lied alot . to not have problems or arguements ..
She tells me that I never put her first when I always though I did . she has very low image of herself . she is jelous of my kids my ex and the life we had prior to her and I What did you lie about?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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Empire you are receiving great advice from excellent vets who have helped many marriages and many MBers to personally recover. Please listen to their advice and answer any question they may have, you have a narrow path for recovery and if you follow the MB principles you have a chance.
I agree you need to move back home.
Me 46yrs
WH 46yrs "Isildur"
Married: 22yrs 8mths
DS 9yrs;DD 19yrs;DS 21yrs
Bomb drop:marriage not working don't know if ILY 12.11.11
DD:26.11.11
WH moves to OW house 28.11.11
Formal MB Plan A 14.4.12
Plan B 27.4.12
D:20.7.14
"There are moments in life that make us & set the course of who we become. Sometimes they're little & subtle,sometimes they're big & we never saw them coming. No one asks for their life to change, but it does. It's what we do afterwards that counts & we find out who we are."
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I lied about my ex It was always about my ex ..Cause she was so insecure it would cause a arguement . She would almost have panick attacks when I have to pick them up every other weekend .It was getting crazy . She started to form resenment against my kids and would leave when I got them for the weekend
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I wanna move home but I feel we are not ready yet .. Empire, the sooner you move home, the sooner you can learn new skills that can transform your marriage. You are making the problem worse by being separated, but I am not telling you anything you don't already know. You had a basic, garden variety fighting problem and you have escalated it into a major disaster. Instead of digging a deeper hole, I would get out of the hole by moving home. You can't fix your marriage problem if you aren't there. You have already proved this to be true.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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So I move back home and everyday I start with my questions and it just pushes her farther and farther away . How can I deal with the issues in my head and deal with hers to am=nd stay nice with no emotion
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Melody lane... That truely hit home ..can fix a problem without being near the problem . Thank you for the graet advise . But how do I stop the thoughts? It consumes me even at work
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I lied about my ex It was always about my ex ..Cause she was so insecure it would cause a arguement . She would almost have panick attacks when I have to pick them up every other weekend .It was getting crazy . She started to form resenment against my kids and would leave when I got them for the weekend What was it about this arrangement that had her so upset?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Melody lane... That truely hit home ..can fix a problem without being near the problem . Thank you for the graet advise . But how do I stop the thoughts? It consumes me even at work You don't stop the thoughts. But you CAN replace them by creating a great marriage. And you can't create a great marriage if you aren't there. You have to have a plan to turn this around.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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She was just insecure.. she though I wanted my ex back and was just with her to make her jealous and She was a live in babysitter when i had to work on saturday ...I heard it all ... plus she knows that I had a visectomy with my first wife so her and I wont have what my ex and I had together .. kids familt that type of stuff
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So say I move back home tomorrow ..what next ? I have no plan cause I never got the manual of marriage?
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I lied about my ex It was always about my ex ..Cause she was so insecure it would cause a arguement . She would almost have panick attacks when I have to pick them up every other weekend .It was getting crazy . She started to form resenment against my kids and would leave when I got them for the weekend She is insecure because you continue to have a relationship with your former wife. Can you make arrangements so you and your ex don't have to communicate or see each other when there is an exchange?
D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!
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She was just insecure.. she though I wanted my ex back and was just with her to make her jealous and She was a live in babysitter when i had to work on saturday ...I heard it all ... plus she knows that I had a visectomy with my first wife so her and I wont have what my ex and I had together .. kids familt that type of stuff Your wife probably felt that she was placed 2nd and 3rd after your x-wife and your kids, which would naturally lead to insecurity. Did she have any voice in decisions regarding visitation and your communication with your X-wife? having to babysit your kids in such an environment would be a nightmare for most women so I can understand how she felt. And to be called "insecure" for hating the situation would have added insult to injury. Do you still communicate with your X-wife? How does your wife feel about that?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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NO I wish there was . But I moved to Florida to be near my kids so Im alone down here my family is all up north ..So there is no way not to see her during the exchange .. but remember she has a ex also but It doesnt bother me I guess
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I only have ever talked to my ex when it came to the kids other than that nothing,, i love my wife im a faithful husband ...
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