She probably wants privacy for herself and her affair partners

Harsh! Would of been cheaper to ask me for my key!

Again I have to remind myself why I'm not picking up the phone and calling. Second guessing will only drive me nuts. I can only change what I do. I'm going through highs and lows. I do still care for her even after the choices she has made. She is lost, I am too. Eventually you find your way out. In my impatience I'm forgetting to enjoy this time to myself. I'm on a day off wasting time until my routine run time. There's many people out there who would love even half the chance. I need to try and remember things like this when I'm not feeling sorry for myself!

Weekly, usually after church I write down at least 5 things I am grateful for with my DS helping. At the end of the month we put them on the refrigerator to remind us that life could be alot worse.

Just reminded me of the other night out on a run I was ready to give up and passed two gents on prosthetic legs. Think I put in an extra mile

Just been informed wife has announced on FB we are now separated!

I know it's a text for a reaction but she's not going to get it. All she is getting is sympathies from part time friends who don't know the whole story. Although her posting the song Another Love straight after wont do her any favours. Good discussion had with friend who revealed this and knows wife. They can see she's in the fog and not being herself. Trouble is right now I'm more concerned about my WS than myself. But I must keep my distance. Trouble for my WS is when she wakes up from this crisis I may not be there anymore. I'm too nice a person sometimes but I've drawn my line in the sand!

Another thought she's obviously getting help and advice and she's still drinking still imploding. I am getting advice and although I have my self pity and mental moments I am trying to remain positive change my lifestyle change myself for the better. Must be something about the advice I'm getting!
Cheers all!

Still thinking! Why am I not vindictive enough to post 'by the way we are separated because my wife refuses to end her affair and work on our marriage'. Oh yes it's because I've already told the people who matter. Whether they choose to support or ignore the situation is theirs to live with. I find a relief in the fact she has 'gone public' with this. She will face questions and will probably spin a lie or two to garner sympathy. I will not lie but neither will I muck rake for those intent on gossip.
One post here that sticks with me throughout and I'm quite fond of quoting is 'When you hide from the truth it has a way of finding you'.

Start a journal of gratitude and every day, write down somthing you are thankful for.
Every day, thank someone for something they do.

Weirdly I'm thankful to my WS for giving me this chance to work on myself. I've always been a talker not a doer. But if you asked my a month ago to run 6 miles I would of scoffed!

And Thank you all for your advice

You're welcome.
The longer you stay in Plan B, the better you will feel.

Noted. The lines been drawn must stay behind it. I can only control me

7 miles

Enjoying this solitude and time to find myself with the relief of no expectation from anyone. Unfortunately the heart sighs and the mind ticks! I've accepted the marriage I had is over yet I still wear my ring. It's still early days yet and my emotions are still conflicting but I still have to look at the road ahead.
So if

WW contacts me says A is over, made a mistake, wants to work on marriage.
Plan A EPs and steps to recovery etc.

WW just wants to talk.
Nothing's changed stay in B anything more is for IM and solicitors.

But what if
WW wants to talk, says A is over (this will probably include saying marriage still over but wants to stay friends). Obviously could still be lying about A. Sources could confirm general feeling. Would I then go back to plan A avoiding all talks of divorce etc. take small steps to establish situation of A and see where to next?
It's this one I'm unsure of as the other two are pretty much 'text book'

Did your Plan B letter outline the Precise steps that she would have to DO to possibly see if reconciliation was still a viable alternative?

If not, what did it say?

Without following the steps outlined in demonstrable Actions, everything else would be putting the cart before the horse.

LTL

Letter was pretty much ripped off the templates here. Said cant be with you or help you until you end relationship. Until affair ends and are willing to work on plan of reconcilliation I will avoid seeing or talking to you.

I'm apprehensive of 'first contact'. When it comes I need to be prepared not to jump straight in with an all or nothing plan.
I'm committed to NC until affair ends, I added no specifics about no contact letters and EPs etc. I'm more concerned with that initial connection where we establish where to go next.

Must add knowing my WW she would see PBL as an ultimatum and even when affair ends cut off her nose to spite her face and use it as an exit affair to see things to an end.
I know I'm playing a guessing game and expectation is the root of all heartache. I'm also trying to prepare myself for any window of opportunity to stall any final plans.

Bluebeck,

If something like this happens please post here FIRST before doing anything