Did you ever reclarify to your exposure targets that she is definitely involved in an affair with the POSOM and that you have her admission as proof and would like their ongoing support to help your marriage, because no marriage can even have a chance if their is another person involved?

LTL

LTL.

I made a large misteak and included my WW in the exposure. due to some of the info being unclear to me at the time. this led to her imidatley pulling Damage control on those i messaged because of that she was able to report the thread as spam/harrasment and get it shut down.( this should also be mention on here that FB will close a message like that if they feel its harrasment.
I also only recently discovered OM brother and sister on FB i plan to Expose to them as they are a catholic family.

the OM has been married to his separated W for 1 1/2 years but at 6 months pregnant he was fired for sexual misconduct while mis becoming of an officer. eventuly a DV and restraint order placed on him. He will not sign the divorce and she can offer me no help due to the nature of that.

My WW supposedly works with OM i have today contacted the HR VP at her employment to disscus the delicate matter. I do not want to LB anymore. my plan A needs to build some love deposits if possible.

I tried to handle this in my own way first before finding MB and caused alot of withdrawls as she was likley alredy in the fog and i was bitching about all sorts of stuff she was lying when my daughter mentiond craigs name the first time and told me she meant Greg and susan close but not the OM name my daughter said. I guess that would be D day.

I also have exposed MB to her in a conversation she is very shrewd and does get the truth out of me. she knows i used a voice recorder as well and i assume she does not make calls inside the house anymore.
I very likley need a coach at this point as i have lost alot of ground with the technique and my WW.
I am more calm now and feel able to implement a sound plan A. however mine is complicated by this.
and i havent seen this mentioned other than she is more likley to have an affair.
My WW wife works nights and after a 3-11 shift she can be mandated to stay and cover a shift if someone is late or cant show up. this makes hanging out for an hour after her shift for a drink or whatever easy.

also because our daughter has day care she can drop her off early and go do what she has planned. ( calls it living life to its fullest)

so my day ends i have to pick up my daughter. she knows I do and exactly where i am. cake.

My Plan A has no real interaction time to deposit love balances. this is what i belive led to her affair in the first place. if i asked why she didnt pick up made a love withdrawal ect.

I am contacting her hr VP to see if she can assit my plan A buy transfer or schedule change or what ever may help save my marriage. plus it part of the plan A exposure break up the affair ect.

HEADS UP: her work situation just thwarted my plans to expose they are going to pay for her to get her BSN.
as i care for her greatly i do not think i will expose to the employer as this could help us. as having a BSN will open up many day job opurtunities in the future also her free time will be filled with classes. I may stagnate perhaps in Plan A. i just got news of this. i do not know any time tables for this as of yet. but i know that it would be a HUGE love buster if i blew education for her kind of wouldnt touch that one with a ten foot carrot on a stick.

Buddy, there is NO MORE "Us" while she is having contact with her affair partner.

You should more correctly say, this will benefet my WW and POSOM so much. I am so happy that they will get all the benefits from this.

LTL

good point. LTL good point..

Sir, you need to expose to work.
Stop worrying about offending her and expose to the employers

Sir,

Dr. Harley would tell you to expose to the employer.
Do you understand this?

Post the OM on Cheaterville here: www.cheaterville.com

I did just expose to work I spoke with the hr dept. The Woman I spoke to will do an small internal investigtion. I have no proof yet that POSOM does actually work there my WW says he does. When I had a conversation with him one time OM said he did not work with her but met WW at her work. It could've been POF for all I know at this point.

Sir,
You need to call OM wife and ask where he works

OMW wont assit me stating safety concerns for her and her children. OMW father stated he didnt know where he worked i told him a pizza place he said that makes sense he did work there before meeting his daughter and i told him about where my WW works since she states he works there and she says a police dept. also but if he works where she works they work them around the clock very unlikley.

Did you post OM on Cheaterville?

This is how you find where he works:
Call your ww employer and ask to speak with OM.
Call the pizza shop and ask to speak with OM.
Call the police station and ask to speak to OM.

Have to register still on cheatervill.
Pizza place is supposed to be some family biz
Police station don't know what town it woud be

Well start by calling ww employer and tell them it is an urgent phone call for OM.

Clint just wanted to say youre not alone, just posted my story last night and sounds like your WS and mine could be twins. I too am getting its just a friend you controlling psycho, etc. I hope both our stories end well, esp since you have kids? My prayers go out to you..its too bad these spouses dont understand how loved they are for us to even be on this forum rather than taking the easy wsy out most of society does and kicking their butts to the curb for a better model. Thats love I guess.

good luck, I am following your journey with hope for you

So. yesterday WW worked late on her day with our daugther so I picked daughter up and then asked WW if she was coming to get daughter.. well this caused WW to be a bit argumenative via text saying she has her these days I have her these days and she will be moving out ect.. will WW remains to be seen this would be the fourth or fifth mention of moving out at this point. I'm still prepared to be in plan A for longer. im guessing me mentioning it was her night was a bit of an LB or appered to come across as such. I did just get out of counseling and was a bit worked up.

I should ask perhaps is there a forum here that is more useful as how to avoid LB's ect..

Do you have the book Love Busters?

Did you respond about her moving out? Did you fight?

What is the counseling for?

I dont I have surviving an affair on order and connecting thru yes aswell as hope for separated: wounded marriages can be healed was like 1.97 used grabbed it.

I did not respond i was tired and text GN to her was all. hope no love busting there. she said she will still go shopping tomorrow or sat.. so i assume it blew over..

we are doing marriage counseling. WW and I have only been to an initial session. i have been seen 3 times for my jelousy and PTSD issues. except yesterday was mostly just me venting plan A to my psyc.

she would like to see us both next week and may do a half hour with my wife alone.

thank you. well let me just tell you I tried to handle this on instinct first big failure. i would have to agree you need to own this if you implment exposure 101. I made many errors. I pushed my wife bassically into the POSOM for all i know. if you have read thru this i hope you pick up on my errors either way sucess in this is best hope situation i feel. avoid Love busting learn to bite your tounge it really dosent take much to set off a defensive wife.. like last nite was her nite she olny picked it last week and she worked thru it. "i said are you picking up (kid)" WW was like what do you mean. im like last week you rescheduled with my mom so you could have wednesdays. well you guess ( " Really? is it that hard for you to go get her while i work ect." total defensive bull.... I said its your day you picked it last week anyways i have her ttyl..

Have you listened to these clips? Have you written Dr Harley?

Beware of Bad Counselors