No, she is not asking you to lie. I think Mel might have misremembered those details. See my post above. Only tell people what you know for a fact - but you do know for a fact that your H has had several affairs, and he contacted that woman for a hook-up, (closure my eye), and she agreed to meet him.

I called the OW and asked for her H and she asked whose calling and I said an old friend. She is suspicious and wanted to know if I wanted to leave a message I said 'no biggy, I would try later' I think she is suspicious of something now!!! I am sooo not good at these things.

I suggest that you do not take that tone with people who have taken time away from their jobs and families (in Mel's case, on the national holiday; I'm in the UK so I'm not caught up with that, but I have been to work all day and then for a date with my husband, and here I am posting to you, after midnight) to try and help you, unless you want to see people vanish from your thread.

I found OWH full title and full name! Now to keep digging for email & ph number

I am sorry, I am so frustrated and feel like I am being blasted for not doing enough. My apologies to MelodyLane, I will be more considerate of your voluntary sacrifice to help poor people like me. Thank you so much, I do appreciate your help!!

Please I do need all your help, MelodyLane and everyone who has given freely; do not stop helping. Even though I can't keep up with all this flow of information, I am trying and have actually made some progress today. Keep fighting for the rights of us betrayed souls!!

This is something that can't be put off. You have a small window of opportunity to complete this job and then it is gone. Did you read the exposure thread? Are you asking people for help?

If you called me and told me that you "suspected" my son was having an affair, I would hang up on you. It is very important that you are more factual or people won't take you seriously. Explain to them why you believe your husband has been unfaithful just as sugarcane described.

You are not good at them, and neither are you listening to me, because I specifically warned you about leaving a message on his voicemail that would tip her off. Calling the house and speaking to her was just as bad as doing that. I warned you that she would be spinning the story to her H, and that is what she is doing now, as well as keeping him away from the phone.

You've tipped off your husband, now, too. The first thing OW will do is contact him to find out if you could have called her H, and now they will both be spinning this story about you, the crazy wife who thinks an innocent meeting over coffee was an affair.

Don't let it stop you trying to contact him directly, but please, be a lot more strategic. You can call the house again if you know for certain that she is out and he is in - but how can you know that?

Keep trying to find a workplace email address, or his personal mobile number.

OW in my case lived in another country, and all I had was her first and surname, both of which are insanely common in their country of origin. When I googled, I got a ton of stuff on other people with those names. But within 5 minutes, I found one document that tied her to my H, and it showed her mobile number and her H's mobile number, and workplace email and landline numbers for both of them, as well as their home address and home landline. The document was the minutes of a meeting, and it contained all the contact details for all the attendees. The nature of the meeting told me that she was the Mrs X that I was looking for.

It is not hard to find anyone these days. Many workplaces post their employees' contact details, and often photographs, on the website. They give a public face to their internal structures these days. Just keep looking for him.

That's not her fault. I told her to call the OW house, disguising her # and ask for the OWH.

Bird, where do these people live? How far away?

How do I change what info shows up when people dial my cell number? I have Iphone 5 I want to call back OW and if her H isn't home yet, leave a message with a fake name and say I'm an old high school friend. Could this work?

SugarCane, they live in the same city, not sure where. We are 100,000 population

Sorry - I'm reading and posting too fast, having come in late and tired.

Sorry for the confusion on your thread, bird. I'll leave you in in Mel's expert hands until morning!

Did you read my post about dialing *67 to disguise your #? I would try that and practice calling your other phone to make sure it works on your phone.

MelodyLane, yes I've been using *67, that's how I found out the OWs cell number, from WHs cell phone records. When you dial it here, you get a message saying ' your number will not be shown to the recipiant' or something like that. But I will try calling both of my phones to make sure its working! Thanks

Thanks

Thanks everyone for your advice. I won't be posting while I take some time to focus on myself and what I need to do. Please be assured I have the loving support of family, friends and my clergy to guide me, as well as the wisdom that comes from above, from my loving Heavenly Father