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I have called Sil to ask for OW phone number and any other info she has. She did not answer, again, so I suspect she has made a decision not to help. I will talk to FIL tonight and see if he can help.
I am prepared to tell WH he must move out immediately if he will not end affair. He will be back one week from this Saturday.
Frankly, I could not have even imagined that I would do that prior to exposure. However, have talking to family and friends, I am ready- I think I needed people to remind me that I am strong and can do this and MUST do it!
I owe everyone in this board a debt I can never repay. I do not know how I would have survived without all the great advice and encouragement. From the bottom of my broken heart, thank you.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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I encourage you to Continue to monitor his accommodations on this trip.
Do you think your SIL has enabled the affair?
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I owe everyone in this board a debt I can never repay. I do not know how I would have survived without all the great advice and encouragement. From the bottom of my broken heart, thank you. You have been doing a great job!!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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If youvare still amenable to reconciliation, you should give him your excellent Plan B Letter, so he knows, in writing, what terms and conditions he must meet before you would even consider it.
LTL
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If youvare still amenable to reconciliation, you should give him your excellent Plan B Letter, so he knows, in writing, what terms and conditions he must meet before you would even consider it.
LTL I agree with that, but she needs to first separate from him and get situated.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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I agree with all of it! A good plan B letter and getting myself situated and separated from him. I am reading up on Plan B again and will be ready, with a little help with everyone here as well borrowed backbone from friends and family!
SIL may very well be enabling the A, hard to believe, we have been friends longer than Sil's, but that is how it looks.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Spoke with FIL and Mil last night. Very touching. My FIL and I cried together, which is unheard of for him. He will see if he has any info on OW or if SIL will call or tell him. FIL had not spoken with WH. Said since I contacted him, we wanted to hear what I had to say first. He is very upset with WH and said he will talk with him when he gets his thoughts together and has a bit of time to process this bombshell.
Fil did say WH called right before my email and never said a thing. FIL was very disappointed OW did not say something. Oh well.
In any case I am still looking and will find OW and E.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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FIL was very disappointed OW did not say something. What do you mean he was disappointed she didn't say anything?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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FIL was very disappointed OW did not say something. What do you mean he was disappointed she didn't say anything? Sorry. I meant that FIL as disappoint WH did not tell him when they spoke.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Found OW's full name and FB account today- all thanks to google. Amazing what the right keywords can find, gotta just keep trying! I found her (very obscure and odd)blog mentioning my Bil and SIL by name and saying she was coming to my town this summer to work where WH told me she did. I reopened by FB account today and SIL is a freind, and I found OW also as friend of SIL. Feeling pretty sure I got the right person.
I am working an my letter to her FB contacts, will use the pay system found in E 101.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Great job!
Make sure you cut and paste her info/friends list so you have it just in case she were to delete her account or put it on lockdown.
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Found OW's full name and FB account today- all thanks to google. Amazing what the right keywords can find, gotta just keep trying! I found her (very obscure and odd)blog mentioning my Bil and SIL by name and saying she was coming to my town this summer to work where WH told me she did. I reopened by FB account today and SIL is a freind, and I found OW also as friend of SIL. Feeling pretty sure I got the right person.
I am working an my letter to her FB contacts, will use the pay system found in E 101. Good job. When will you be exposing?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Found OW's full name and FB account today- all thanks to google. Amazing what the right keywords can find, gotta just keep trying! I found her (very obscure and odd)blog WONDERFUL NEWS!  I commend you for being persistent in digging for OWs info. Be sure to expose to her parents and any siblings.
DDays - six months of them THANK YOU God and Marriage Builders. We never knew that it could be this good! 
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[/quote]
Good job. When will you be exposing?
[/quote]
Likely this weekend. I want to do it while WH is away so OW faces it alone.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Posts: 105
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Posts: 105 |
Great job!
Make sure you cut and paste her info/friends list so you have it just in case she were to delete her account or put it on lockdown. Great advice. I just did it!
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Posts: 105
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Posts: 105 |
Well, heard back for other BIL and SIL- they are good friends with OW and reason she came to our town. Said knew WH was friends with OW but not about A. Not sure I buy that. Also said will not say anything to WH or OW, want to stay out, none of their business. I bet if SIL had to walk mile in my shoes, it may have been a different response, but ya never know. Frankly,I am surprised they responded at all.
Big weekend exposing to OW's FB friends so no time to dwell on Bil/SIL response. After work today, I will begin. OW has lots of FB friends, so will take time to do.
Thanks again for all great advice and support.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Well, heard back for other BIL and SIL- they are good friends with OW and reason she came to our town. Said knew WH was friends with OW but not about A. Not sure I buy that. Also said will not say anything to WH or OW, want to stay out, none of their business. I bet if SIL had to walk mile in my shoes, it may have been a different response, but ya never know. Frankly,I am surprised they responded at all.
Big weekend exposing to OW's FB friends so no time to dwell on Bil/SIL response. After work today, I will begin. OW has lots of FB friends, so will take time to do.
Thanks again for all great advice and support. Did you expose to OW's family?
FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.
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Posts: 105
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Only found OW mom so far, mailed letter but not likely it has reached her yet. Will keep looking for more of OW family. Maybe some of her FB contacts are family with different last names, we will see I suppose.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Only found OW mom so far, mailed letter but not likely it has reached her yet. Will keep looking for more of OW family. Maybe some of her FB contacts are family with different last names, we will see I suppose. noone, how many Facebook friends does she have? I would expose to as many of them as possible. But you need to get this done NOW. Exposure should only take 24-48 hours in order to create a tsunami effect. Dragging this out diminishes the impact.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Posts: 105
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She has about 140. I plan to do them all, ya never know who is who. Should be done by this evening. My Internet connection where I am working is pretty slow, so it will a bit longer than in most areas and I want to space them by a minute or so, hoping FB will not flag or stop it.
Me: BW (45)
WH: 47
Married: 1999
No kids, one wonderful dog
DD #1 (EA, but said was over) 6.27.15
DD# 2 (ongoing PA) 9.11.15
Plan B started 10.1.15
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