My wife is being very unreasonable and is accusing of having an affair with a friend. This woman is a good friend who house I spent the night over a few times. I admitted I have feelings for the woman and kissed her a few times. But I never had sex with her. My wife is demanding I get rid of the only good friends that I have. My wife said that she cannot function while this is going on. I took my friend out to eat a few times without my wife knowledge. My wife blew up when she found the receipts and she makes a big deal about any text with the woman. Why is she trying to take away a good friend? I have went through a lot in the past year (sick parents, loss of job) and like talking to my friend. My wife purchased an airline ticket for the wrong day and uses this as an excuse saying she could not think straight. This has all happened in the past week.

She is making it like cheating is the worse thing that can happen in a marriage and that it is killing her inside?

One minute she wants to work on the marriage and the next she wants to leave. She has become very possessive and insist on seeing my cell phone. She is trying to force me to get rid of my friend. WHy does she keep bringing the incident up and I want to just move forward, how can we when she keeps bringing it up? Worse of all out of the blue she will start crying and getting mad. I feel she is taking this incident overboard.

To others out there I need some advice to get my wife to see that this is only a friend. She is demanding I end all contact with the woman.

Why does she keep bringing it up and start crying out of the blue?

What kind of a cruel, inhuman man would torment his wife like that? The best thing she can do is leave you so she can get away from your abuse. Hopefully, she will leave you because you are a dangerous, thoughtless, uncaring man.

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You aren't even a good liar. A 5 year old could see through that lie.

Just a friend? Nice try.

This woman is not a "friend" - she is your affair partner....the other woman. Yuck.

Here's the problem, little fella, your wife knows you are a liar and are having an affair. You know that you have hurt her terribly yet you continue to hurt her. That means you are one mean, cruel SOB. What kind of married man kisses other women and spends the nights with her? A cruel adulterer, thats who.

And my suggestion is to smarten up and stop with the dumb lies. I know wetbrains who can come up with better lies than that. These lies are so stupid they are laughable.

You need to leave your wife alone and let her get away in peace. She deserves much better than this.

This guy is a troll.

Actually, I think this boy's wife is posting here. No wonder she is on the verge of suicide. I know it is hard to imagine some one so cruel.

I am not a troll, I am just trying to understand why my wife is demanding I get rid of friend. Lately we have been having problems in our marriage. Since January she has been spending a lot of time away from the home doing work related stuff. I love her but even the children realize she is gone a lot.I needed her to be there for me. My friend is someone l can talk to.

If you want to stay married, you have to stop your affair and protect your wife from your adultery. You should NEVER speak to the OW again. Otherwise you are not a safe person. Don't say you "love" her when you drive her to the point of suicide.

The problem is your affair.

You need to understand one thing: if you don't stop your affair and commit to never seeing or speaking to the OW again, you will lose your wife.

Do you want to lose your marriage?

When you take a woman alone to dinner that is a date! You are in an emotional affair, at least.

He is in a sexual affair.

I'm sure he is considering he spent the night.

Your wife is not being the least bit unreasonable. Your "friend" is a major threat to your marriage and your reasonable wife knows it.

what is not "reasonable" is for you to have an opposite sex "friend" for whom you "Have feelings," and "have been kissing" and go out on dates with, and spend the night at her house and expect your wife to accept any of that.

How cruel and uncaring can you be?

If your wife was making out with some guy and dating him and sleeping at his house, would you think that was fine as long as she said he was her "friend" and she "wanted" him as a friend?

You are destroying your marriage.

If your wife is gone a lot for work, address that issue with her and figure out a way that you are not separated at night.
But don't think that somehow makes it okay for you to have an affair. Or a female "friend" that you talk to about all your feelings. And kiss. And spend the night with... Ridiculous.

Could you ask your wife to post here?

It doesn't matter. A marriage cannot survive if one spouse insists on doing things regardless of how the other feels about it.

If you want to sleep over some skanky woman's house who doesn't care if you're married, then why not just let your poor wife go.

Nasty OW or your marriage....choose one. You can't have both.

Because it hurts her like being dipped in a vat of acid and then thrown into hell.

So divorce her.

When you signed up for this website, you clicked an agreement saying that you had read Dr. Harley's Basic Concepts. Did you actually read them, or did you lie?

Here they are so you can read them:

http://marriagebuilders.com//graphic/mbi3550_summary.html

Also, I suggest you read this, too:

http://marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8001_affair.html