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Originally Posted by Armagan
But what if she really ended the affair? What if I can't find any evidence that it's been continuing? Wouldn't it be very bad to expose a past affair? I really don't want to insult my wife for nothing. It is so painful for me. I am crying at the moment.
If I find any evidence I won't hesitate to expose it even a second. But what if she is innocent? I really believe that is so.

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Originally Posted by Armagan
But what if she really ended the affair? What if I can't find any evidence that it's been continuing? Wouldn't it be very bad to expose a past affair? I really don't want to insult my wife for nothing. It is so painful for me. I am crying at the moment.

Oh no, even a past affair must be exposed. Why are you upset? You want to help your wife, don't you? If she was a heroin addict, wouldn't you want to get her therapy? That is exactly what exposure is.

And her affair is not over. She has been having an affair this whole time.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by Armagan
Originally Posted by Armagan
But what if she really ended the affair? What if I can't find any evidence that it's been continuing? Wouldn't it be very bad to expose a past affair? I really don't want to insult my wife for nothing. It is so painful for me. I am crying at the moment.
If I find any evidence I won't hesitate to expose it even a second. But what if she is innocent? I really believe that is so.

It is not so. I understand you WANT to believe that. But you need to face the truth.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Armagan Offline OP
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I bought a flight ticket to home for tonight. I'll surprize her. I'll tell her that I'm not confortable for being away and I don't want her to drive 700+ km alone on 08 September night. I am sure that she will piss off and say that I came to bust her on action. I hope it worths.

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I'll try to get evidence from her attitutes and from her phone. Untill then I will have serious hesitations for exposure.

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Originally Posted by Armagan
I'll try to get evidence from her attitutes and from her phone. Untill then I will have serious hesitations for exposure.

Her "attitude" is not evidence. You need rock solid evidence. WE didn't tell you to expose without evidence.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by Armagan
I bought a flight ticket to home for tonight. I'll surprize her. I'll tell her that I'm not confortable for being away and I don't want her to drive 700+ km alone on 08 September night. I am sure that she will piss off and say that I came to bust her on action. I hope it worths.

Our goal is to help you save your marriage, not to avoid her anger at all cost. If she says you are trying to bust her, then that should tell she is doing something she can be busted FOR, right?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by Armagan
And we argued about it. frown

However she responds to your surprise arrival, you need to not argue about anything. It takes two people to argue. When you argue, you make the OM look so great! Is that what you want, to make him look great?

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When you arrive home, tell your wife you love her and missed her and are sorry for agreeing to the marriage wrecking behavior of being away all summer, and that you are not going to leave her side again.

What is your plan for snooping?

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Originally Posted by unwritten
When you arrive home, tell your wife you love her and missed her and are sorry for agreeing to the marriage wrecking behavior of being away all summer, and that you are not going to leave her side again.

What is your plan for snooping?


I want to ask permission to inspect her phone. If she doesn't allow me I'll install webwatcher while she is sleeping.

I know you won't approve this.

Or I I'll try to inspect her phone while she is sleeping. If I suspect anything I'll install webwatcher.

I haven't decided yet. I've got 5 hours to decide.

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I already told her I feel regret for listening to her. But she told me we'd better stay away from each other for a while

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Originally Posted by Armagan
Originally Posted by unwritten
When you arrive home, tell your wife you love her and missed her and are sorry for agreeing to the marriage wrecking behavior of being away all summer, and that you are not going to leave her side again.

What is your plan for snooping?


I want to ask permission to inspect her phone. If she doesn't allow me I'll install webwatcher while she is sleeping.

I know you won't approve this.

Or I I'll try to inspect her phone while she is sleeping. If I suspect anything I'll install webwatcher.

I haven't decided yet. I've got 5 hours to decide.

It is a silly idea to ask her to look at her phone. She will just get into the habit of deleting anything incriminating and then you will never know. You need to think more strategically if you want to save your marriage. The first step is to find the truth. If you can get the truth, you have a small chance of saving your marriage. Don't let on that you are suspicious at all and quietly install webwatcher.

Instead of relying upon your own inexperience, please let us help you. Your best thinking got you into this mess; it won't get you out because you have no experience. Please just accept that simple truth so you can move forward.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Originally Posted by Armagan
I already told her I feel regret for listening to her. But she told me we'd better stay away from each other for a while

The answer should be no. You post like she is your momma and you are a boy. You are a grown man who does not take orders from your wife. Don't be a cuck.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Armagan Offline OP
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Originally Posted by MelodyLane
Originally Posted by Armagan
Originally Posted by unwritten
When you arrive home, tell your wife you love her and missed her and are sorry for agreeing to the marriage wrecking behavior of being away all summer, and that you are not going to leave her side again.

What is your plan for snooping?


I want to ask permission to inspect her phone. If she doesn't allow me I'll install webwatcher while she is sleeping.

I know you won't approve this.

Or I I'll try to inspect her phone while she is sleeping. If I suspect anything I'll install webwatcher.

I haven't decided yet. I've got 5 hours to decide.

It is a silly idea to ask her to look at her phone. She will just get into the habit of deleting anything incriminating and then you will never know. You need to think more strategically if you want to save your marriage. The first step is to find the truth. If you can get the truth, you have a small chance of saving your marriage. Don't let on that you are suspicious at all and quietly install webwatcher.

Instead of relying upon your own inexperience, please let us help you. Your best thinking got you into this mess; it won't get you out because you have no experience. Please just accept that simple truth so you can move forward.


OK. I'll follow MB way.

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I have arrived at home about an hour ago (around 01:00 local time). She looked very happy and excited to me. We were busy withtelling how much we missed and love each other and we made love. I few minutes ago she went back to sleep.

So what's next?

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Originally Posted by Armagan
I have arrived at home about an hour ago (around 01:00 local time). She looked very happy and excited to me. We were busy withtelling how much we missed and love each other and we made love. I few minutes ago she went back to sleep.

So what's next?

Did you read our posts?


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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Yes. I'm sorry. I was exhausted last night. We both couldn't sleep till the morning.

I'll first check if she has a password and then wait for an opportunity to install webwatcher.
The problem is the phone is almost always with her because of her job (even in the bathroom). She makes hundreds of phone calls every day. It'll be very hard to find the opportunity. I think my best chances are when she has gone for swimming or sleeping.
Have you got any suggestions?

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I did as you said. No evidence so far.

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The beginning of our 10 days of vacation was very satisfying. But the last week I felt a little distance. And we didn't have sex for 10days.

I have some questions:
1. I want to put a VAR into her car. Do you have any suggestions where to hide the VAR? (regarding noise, clear records, etc.)
2. She wants to Italy with her two sisters for a vacation. I said it is possible only if I would come also. She and sisters insisted in going that vacation without husbands. We postponed the issue. What should I do?

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You said that you have no evidence but have you been snooping? What are you doing?

You can purchase a voice activated recorder and Velcro it in a place where she talks on the phone, such as under her car seat or under a desk. You also need spyware on her phone and computer.

I would never agree to her going on a vacation without you. Bad for your marriage.


"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt

Exposure 101


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