Thank you LH!

About the account - he originally deposited X amount into his new account and transferred about 2/3 of X into our joint account. Then last night tells me that he has Y amount to deposit into our joint account. When I asked how much he had in his account, he answered Z amount. Z amount was a complete lie - he left the bank receipt sticking out of a zipper in his suitcase.

I want to sit him down and have a money talk, but I'm not sure that it would do any good. But I just want him to see how much he is hurting our family financially. But he is so stuck in his world/fog that I don't think it would do any good. Therefore, I am taking steps to further protect us financially today.

I did read Mulan's thread ... and every time he does something like that, all I can think is "Gaslighting! He is soooooooo gaslighting right now!" I'll re-read the thread today for some encouragement on handling this better.

He is certainly distancing more and more. I suppose I need to start trying to detach from the situation, as I am allowing it to affect me more and more instead of less and less.

I shouldn't be asking how long until he makes a decision ... I should be asking myself how long I'm willing to wait for him to show a commitment to our M.