On the one hand, I think I could move forward a little easier just hearing him finally admit that he was physical with the OW and apologizing for it. I've even thought of just asking her, as she has nothing to lose or gain, but ...

One thing our MC is largely against is what he calls "contingency marriage" ... an "I'll do this if you do that" kind of thing. Its great, in theory, but difficult sometimes. But, maybe this is what I've been doing? "I'll ease up and feel more loved if you'll just [xyz]." I don't know. Maybe its best for me to just give in, stop being so stubborn about having our marriage go the way I want it to, and then maybe things will be better. Maybe if I just give in to everything he'll follow suit and eventually I'll get what I need?

Last edited by time_for_change; 09/09/07 09:38 AM.