I'm deeply ashamed of my behavior, my wife caught me (i'm glad she did). it was mostly email, and one girl i exchanged info with, which may of lead to something physical.
I cant explain my actions, my wife thinks she has done something to drive me to this behavior, she has done nothing but bend over backwards and be a good loving wife to me. I was at a loss for an answer, then i met a councelor (social worker) through my job.
I was hardly in her office for a minute before i had cried like i never had before. after her consultation she determined that i have an addiction problem. She will be refering me to a specialist to help me and my family get through this.
I think my wife is having her doubts (who can blame her)
but i am going to see this through weather she stands by or not. i cant go on like this, i hate who i have become.
I used to be a guy everyone can turn to and respect, now i'm no better or maybe even worse then my "locked up" ex brother in law. I can no longer look any of my loved ones in the eye, its a terrible feeling.
I know i have a long road ahead and i'm anxious to drive
down it.I need to regain my dignity and self respect and
conquer my demons,my family is owed that much.
I dont know what my future holds, but in the end i hope to at least be a respectable person again. I cant live like this. I'm going to get the counceling i need and hopefully have my family respect me again some day. Its all i have to live for!!!

wish me luck.......