She did make a mistake and so did you. Now you both need to own up to your individual mistakes, fix them together and move forward as a couple. If not as a couple, then fix them separately and do it b4 the D.

I am not sure why u 2 got married in the 1st place but now with history and children, it makes it a bit more complicated. U both are in an M and a R.

Go read Surviving an Affair and His Needs/Her Needs. You have allowed yourself at the very least to have an EA with a bunch of strange and degrading women. They are sick and you are also a sicko for participating in such degrading behavior. Don't minimize it. She doesn't want you to say it will all get better, you have to show her it will get better.

If u 2 can read the books and the concept section above together it will help.

As for reading multiple sites.....that is not as constructive as finding the one that is best and utilizing it properly.

Steve H is the son of Dr W. Harley and a counselor here @ MB. On this discussion board we are merely chatting about our POVs and experiences. The discussion board are not professionals.

I recommend you call Steve's office and arrange for some phone counseling or find an MC in your area familiar with MB concepts. Steve is very good with help both WS' and BS'.

Get started.

L.