And for those who think what I'm doing is "wrong" - I'd like to hear what alternatives you'd suggest that are "better" for the kids?

I'm not saying your wrong!
I'm only suggesting you look at whats BEST not just what the world is saying is OK......
Re-read the questions I asked in my last post and ponder them honestly without the rose colored glasses.
Only you can answer these???

The kids would already be torn if they had to spend the day with one or the other... spend it with Dad and miss it with Mom - or spend it with Mom and miss it with Dad. How is that "better"?
Sucks as a kid either way!
I feel many parents are alleviating their own guilt with questions like this.....SORRY

IMO it's better for the kids to have 2 parents who can get along and be friendly toward one another than having them angry and bitter at one another, cutting the other down or not even caring the other exists. A child is a product of *both* parents, and I remember wondering "what did that make me?" when either or both of my parents were ignorant and bitter and cut each other down.
I would agree. It's always best that adults act like adults.

My daughter's best friend's father left her mother for another MAN. The mother remarried - and when the girl's father visits, he stays with the family. The stepdad has children from previous marriages (2 of them, 2 other marriages) and those children (and grandchild on the way) are also welcome in the home. Would it be *better* for the young lady in question if her mother wouldn't allow her father to stay when he visits? If not for that, her father probably couldn't afford to visit more than once a year, if that.
Tough [censored], maybe he needs to move closer to his children so he can put his children ahead of himself for a change.

When my XH was living with his GF
Great example for the kids and their future decision making process. NOT!

It may be unpalatable for some to consider, but to me it's the Christian thing to do.
boyfriends/girlfriends living with each other... no Christian example there.

Forgive, move on, and do the right thing.
Forgiveness is an act of Christianity, but we are to repent and change our wayward ways as an act of repentance. NOT live in ways that continue to show our children that sin is acceptable.

Some of the "alternatives" offered up here are unacceptable *to me*... it's not within me to be that selfish and hateful as to deny the best possible situation despite the circumstances, to my kids.

I'm sorry you see what you are doing as the BEST, IMHO I disagree...

I still want you to have a Merry Christmas and know I wish you and your kids a Happy New Year.

Recovery began 10/07;

Meeting my wife's EN's is my "thank you" that refuses to be silenced.